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Transcripts may (read: definitely will) contain typos. We use software to transcribe the show and American artificial intelligence is apparently not intelligent enough to understand the Irish accent; go figure!
In time, if people read these, we'll have them fully proof read by human intelligence and corrected for grammar and syntax.
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[00:00:00] [00:00:00] Chris: [00:00:00] Connor. How are you? You are our first guest ever. So I just want to take a minute to say thank you very much for giving us the time to come on. We're both, like all of us are very grateful that you've given us the time. Time is precious. Uh, I know Yemen training really, really hard and Auckland and, uh, giving us an hour or two of your time is, uh, is amazing.
[00:00:21] Conor: [00:00:21] No worries. Glad to be here.
[00:00:24] Chris: [00:00:24] I really want to jump into your story because I think, I don't think I've ever encountered someone that has gone through as many personas as you have gone through. And I think it's an amazing, it's an amazing story and a fascinating me. I didn't have a social media up until, you know, we started this really.
[00:00:44] So I didn't know about your story. So I had to do a bit of a deep dive on you. So I listened to your podcast. I read it automatically goes to vote you. I went through your age and I think that what fascinates me really is that you have gone and you've created and destroyed [00:01:00] multiple personas. Okay. So I see there's like, there's a, kind of a, uh, a narrative here where there was a kind of, uh, Oh, the wilderness years as you call it, which I think is an interesting, uh, named forest, uh, you know, because of the connotations of, of wild there.
[00:01:15] And then there's kind of the post, whether this year's or the rebirth. Okay. So I want to kind of astral projected to specific moments in time, and I'd like you to maybe tell us the stories, those moments in time, and maybe we can learn from, from those stories. Okay. So first things first. You moved to the Glen.
[00:01:33] Okay. Before we moved to Glen Moyer as a young man, and I feel like this is like a turning point in your life and correct me if I'm wrong, your telephony story of, uh, of people trying to Rob your champions league cards and, uh, you know, a fellow coming across to you and telling you, you were going to the shop one day.
[00:01:50] Um, and, uh, you had to defend yourself. I feel like this is like, uh, the, the, the manifestation of some early signs of masculinity. Can you tell us [00:02:00] the story of moving to the Glen and how it affected you and you know, what went on from there?
[00:02:04] Conor: [00:02:04] Yeah, for sure. And yeah, we were kind of approved or no, or what I suppose thing is I was so young that like, everything is out of nowhere, you know, you're never involved in the discussions with your parents.
[00:02:15] Like, you know, do you want to move? I was like, no, we just moved and that's it. And, um, When I, when I found myself there, it was like, you know, it was only five, six years old. And, um, it was quickly, you know, presented to me that it was an area where you just grew the fuck up. And, um, that was it, you know, um, I definitely found that a shock, like, you know, moving into a place like that, because at that time it was very, very similar, you know, I think all over the country, they started getting rid of the flat buildings, you know, and later in years, but there was still lots of hirees flats and people living in poverty, really.
[00:02:55] Like, you know, at that time the guy was a bit sheltered from Nash. Um, [00:03:00] I was, you know, we were living in my grandmother's house, but we were kind of sheltered from the poverty side. All of us. Well, we definitely, um, felt dish. Um, like in, as a kind of a presence, whenever it was and our own dish, like, you know, going into my friend's houses that lived in the flats and, you know, not knowing it the Italian way, there was bottles and stuff everywhere.
[00:03:22] And John was just completely different to the host that I was living in. No, it was a completely different atmosphere and, uh, yeah, it was, uh, it was, it was a place where you're going to have to have your guard up at all times because, um, you know, when you put that many people in that kind of smaller space, um, you know, people, people kind of, I suppose, have to, you have to fight for your place.
[00:03:44] You have to stick your flag in the ground and say, you know, let's say this is my life. Like, you know what I mean? Don't step on my toes here. And then. Yeah, that was my first kind of interaction with, um, like, um, I suppose, fighting aggression and, [00:04:00] and having to kind of stand my ground reading. Um, and as you said, it was like, you know, you have something I want, um, and I'm going to try and take it off you.
[00:04:09] And if you're not going to be able to, to keep it, then you're going to lose it. And, uh, I think that followed me on. For a lot of my kind of younger life and into even my teenage years of like, you know, you always have to prepare to defend yourself. Um, and it kind of gave me this general. A message. You know, that day when I finally decided that I wasn't going to take, you know, get my fucking candidates taken anymore, um, and decided to strike back that wasn't the end of it.
[00:04:40] You know, that wasn't the end of me, you know, um, stomp my feet and say, no, I'm not gonna, you know, nothing to let you just take my guides. I'm not gonna let you just treat me the way you want to treat me like, so it was, you know, then taken upon, as you said, the, my, my first persona of. You're not going to be able to, you're not going to be able [00:05:00] to do that to me.
[00:05:00] You're not going to be able to mess with me like that. And, um, violence became a way of like settling disagreements and indeed, sometimes even preempting disagreements and yeah. No, not really like, um, have you guys ever like been in a foyer as a young flower as an all that kind of like after effect of that high burst of adrenaline, you just feel kind of shaky you feeling?
[00:05:28] I think, just think that's a horrible feeling, to be honest with you. Yeah. You know, eh, I, I like I've been in school fights and things like that because I, I, I load that the following be true into my school life. And do you know, I was a chubby kid. I was a chubby awkward kid. And like, you know, a way of defending myself from verbal abuse was, was just physically, you know, trying to set like disagreements.
[00:05:50] And, um, you know, I just know, I, I don't think I, I suppose it was useful to me at the time, because it was fairly easier to adjust, you know, Put your [00:06:00] fist up to someone's face then to actually, you know, figure out what the problem is within you. You know? So it was useful for me then at that time to use that, to set ligaments, you know,
[00:06:11] Noel: [00:06:11] it's just a means to get through it as opposed to actually kind of like this.
[00:06:14] It was
[00:06:14] Conor: [00:06:14] yeah. Yeah, absolutely. I then, you know, yeah. I didn't, I didn't really like it very much. I had an, I had an awful lot of fear, you know, and Mike Tyson talks about this as well. Like, you know, having like buckets of fear, like you can imagine Mike Tyson, like thinking about this super intimidating character being just terribly afraid.
[00:06:34] And he talks about, uh, walking out to the ring and he just feels terrified that this man is going to beat him. This man is going to take his, you know, take his undisputed, take his title, you know, Demasculate him, you know what I mean? Um, and he had that fear. I think I had that fear as well. And so it was tying with me on board, say there was one say they kind of knew that I was able to physically look after myself.
[00:06:56] I know there was another site that was just absolutely terrified [00:07:00] of the actual interaction of, of the fight. Like, you know, um, And then one of the
[00:07:05] Chris: [00:07:05] flavors, I think everyone's got a plan until they get punched.
[00:07:09] Conor: [00:07:09] Yeah. Yeah. That's yeah. That's that's
[00:07:13] Dan: [00:07:13] everyone. I think everyone, at some point needs to be punched in the face.
[00:07:17] I honestly do believe this because I think. If, if you, like, you mentioned that feeling of like post-fight Connor, when you're, you're shaking and you're, you know, you're, you're, you're, you're, adrenaline's go nineties, true roof, but you also then get this, like, hang on. I am not made of glass I'm alive type thing as well of like, you know, you only know, like I recently trains, uh, for, for an amateur MMA fight.
[00:07:40] And I remember the first time I was punched in the face properly, I was like, so afraid to be punched in the face. And I was like, once I, once that happened to me, I was like, Oh my God, Like I'm I'm okay. I can survive this and you carry that and it does wonders for your constant. I'm not, I'm not recommending people go out and get in fights or, or, or start any fights
[00:08:01] [00:08:00] to two meters. You just have to have a very, very, very long reach. It is a feeling of like, Oh my God, I can survive this. I'm okay. I can handle myself. I'm not this fragile, you know? Delicate thing that people think I am, I am actually able to handle this know
[00:08:19] Noel: [00:08:19] yeah. Where that can go. There'll be none at all, but that's where it can actually go because.
[00:08:24] Like you get to that point on you turned, left and set on. I'm going to be up. I'm going to stand up for myself. It didn't like it whatsoever, but like, I suppose you'll get people that, and you'll get times and know. I certainly, I would have been that where I turned right now, I turned left later on in life of being able to know I'm actually going to stand off, but that it's, I suppose, it's for people to try and kind of manage.
[00:08:44] They, they don't know how to turn left and lean into that fear or whatever the fear or whatever the, the, the, the metaphoric punch in the face is. It says, no, it is. It's a difficult one, I suppose. It's trying to figure out what I'm trying to figure out how you go left and trying to find something. Yeah. Do you can have it automatically, which is, but it [00:09:00] sounds a bit, you did.
[00:09:00] That's the way you just responded.
[00:09:02] Conor: [00:09:02] Yeah. Like for me, it was like, um, it was opening the doors to serious anger issues as well as race. Because, um, like when you're confronted with situations where you can't use physical means to settle things or to explain things, then you're, you're, you're caught in this limbo.
[00:09:20] You're like, I don't want to actually have the skills or the words here to like, you know, to explain what I'm going through or to explain my point of view to this person. And yet there, and there's no, you know, there's no way of actually like, you know, physically settling these things as well. So it's like when I was in my first couple of jobs, there'll be times where like, I'd feel, I'd feel tremendous, tremendous, like aggression and anger towards like superiors.
[00:09:48] And I've never, and I wouldn't be able to leave that out and it just festered and saved me. And it, it can be very dangerous. Like, you know, if that, if you lean on a certain way of settling things, Um, [00:10:00] and then, you know, th the there's a situation presents where that's not actually going to settle it, or like, you know, even with my parents, when I was, when I was young fella, like, you know, like I'm not gonna be able to beat up my dad.
[00:10:10] Like, you know what I mean? It's like, you know, I'm, I'm 10 years old. I just have this, you know, I just had this whirlwind temper because I didn't really develop the. The social skills, you know, to actually, you know, to deal with that. So, um, and that followed me through again, into my teenagers as well. I think it actually starts to Camden when I started actually facing professionally, you know, what I actually started to actually fall, uh, it really actually gonna settle down.
[00:10:36] Cause I think that maybe it had given that kind of release that I was looking for. Um, and it kind of gave me this area that was kind of mine as well and all this kind of, uh, My identity, you know, and, um, and, uh, given me something to kind of, I suppose, um, pin my own personality too.
[00:10:57] Chris: [00:10:57] I think this is a really interesting segue into, um, [00:11:00] your Thai boxing career, which I believe is already well told.
[00:11:03] You've given great accounts on your first two or three episodes of your own show, and there's a lot of articles about it. Um, but I specifically like to look at the falling around of your 2013, uh, title, please. Hmm. I think this is like a, a pivotal moment in your life from an objective perspective, because you built up, um, you know, the fight into it was going to be a moment for you to transcend no, you were going to, to, to win and be the top fighter in your age bracket or weight class in the country.
[00:11:37] And you ultimately let the failure. Yeah. Can you tell us the story of that Fort round and, and describe the events that proceeded? Yeah.
[00:11:46] Conor: [00:11:46] Um, I suppose that's like, that was what every single training session up until that point for the last like six years was leading to in my head, you know, it was like, I'm going to get to this first thing of just.
[00:11:59] Becoming [00:12:00] Irish champion, to be honest with you, I didn't even look past that. I didn't look past like, you know, and it's just, so it seems, um, kind of almost funny, you know, like to think that that was my be all and end, all of my entire life was this bit of leather with, you know, a couple of bits, it's a metal attached to it.
[00:12:15] Like, you know what I mean? It was like, Everything to me, you know what I mean? And everything, all my money, but, you know, um, at that point in time, that was it. That was, that was everything that I was looking for. And, um, I really feel like, Oh, you had. Purposely, almost a limited, a limited eliminated every other aspect of my life, like singularly on boom.
[00:12:39] I'm just a fucking tell you boxer and that's it. And I'm just like, yeah, I was in college and I was, had a girlfriend and I had all of these things, but like push came to shove at that point until you. Fucking not and was getting in the way of say boxing. I was going to training whether it was rain, hail or shine, whether it was fucking, you know, the, the, the fucking law ball was on that [00:13:00] night or whether my girlfriend wants to go to the fucking cinema.
[00:13:04] It didn't give, I didn't give a shit about any of that. I was like, I have a training session to go to, and it's just this one track mind. And when you are low something to take control of your life like that, I think you can be very dangerous because you're, you're, you're attaching your essentially identity and who you are to that, to that particular thing.
[00:13:23] And when you attach your identity to something and everything in your life is moving towards this one thing, when it goes. You're you're, you're, you're left with really nothing. Or you're left with scraps to pick off or something, you know, it's like a, it's a, you know, you have to break and your grandmother's favorite base or something like that.
[00:13:44] Or you're just trying to like put these little pieces back together, but not all the pieces are fitting. And when this, Oh, he was tightened before he came a boat. I remember the day that I actually found out it was, I was showing the pollster. Um, far, the [00:14:00] fight needs by my court. Like, and there I was at next to potty, my buddy, um, no we're good friends.
[00:14:06] And, um, w we want to fight for the Irish title and I was fucking deleted as that it was Patty that not but yells because he was the best in the country, in my estimation as like I wanted to fight the best. And this is, I've only talked about this in my, in my most recent episode of my podcast was this element of like self accountability.
[00:14:27] And how I didn't just actually want to be Irish champion. And, and I, I didn't just want to have the belt. I wanted to be the best guy. You know, I wanted to be the best guy. If I didn't beat the best guy, I wasn't the best. And I wasn't, you know, I wasn't Irish champion really in my mind, but if I beat Patty the way you're deemed to be the best in the country, then it was, it was real for me.
[00:14:53] No one else out there. Yeah, it was just, that was going to be age. And that was, it was real for me. And it was [00:15:00] didn't matter what anybody is taught about it. Or if anybody was just a passing, a PA showing a passing fancy of boxing, going over to that fight night, that night I couldn't get shit. I didn't care about what they were thinking about.
[00:15:11] That was like the best Scotti fight, the best guy to beat the best coder in the basket. And that was it. And, um, God, like I've never actually broken dough in the fight Roan Varone before. Like, you know, like in, in any kind of a quick way, but like how it, how it stacked. It was, um, fuck it. I was just so filled with so much nervous energy.
[00:15:32] It wasn't even funny, like, you know, and all you had been kind of cool calm, collected in many of my other fights, you know, I had kind of lost really the stage for the nerves really, before you go into a fight, like, you know, cause. Um, you know, I was as, probably as well, like so used to winning fights at that time, I was an animal, like a seven Ray fight, wind street.
[00:15:53] And I didn't, you know, I didn't think that I was going to lose, you know, like, uh, in one way. [00:16:00] And then there was another pack of me that was absolutely terrified. Just terrified that I was going to be phoned up, that I was going to be phone widowed for not being as good as I am. That he's on a different level to me.
[00:16:13] And I, I, I, that played on my mind, wrote the whole fight camp, but when the bell rang, you know, all the fucking plans that I had were, and I didn't even get punched in the face, I didn't even get punched base. It was literally like the RAF, just put his hand down for the fight, the staff. And I was just like, I'm fucking going for this, you know?
[00:16:32] So I just went to try and, and literally take his head clean off the shoulders from this, from the get go, like, you know, and then. That wastes a lot of energy. And we both kind of went down to that the first round in the second round. And we were, we were still in bullet quite fresh. And then in deterred round, one of the, probably the changing point was.
[00:16:55] Um, I hit him, like, I, I got, uh, hit him with a right straight [00:17:00] and he fell to the ground now. I was born. I was kind of falling forward too. So it, it looked like a slip. And when you look back at the actual, um, at the actual video that you can see, he's actually shaken on the ground, the RAF didn't call it an con, so they didn't, he didn't give him an aid.
[00:17:18] Um, In the actual fight. So he just told him to get up and like my coaches and my whole con or whatever, fucking go, go walk in pressure and pressure. These harpies are I'll try and finish this fight. Like, so I was trying to app, I was trying to get him over there, like, you know, so, Oh, you just went absolutely tooth and nail at them.
[00:17:40] And in the third rooms, didn't, didn't manage to actually, you know, um, You know, get many more like can cost blows, let's say. And, um, just completely drained every single until my energy, I survived the Fort ruined and then the fifth round I [00:18:00] was absolutely owed on my feet. Just completely not really drained the way court was horrible on me.
[00:18:06] And it really took its toll and the last round, um, Oh yeah. Cartwheel and absolutely perfectly time chart. And I get knocked unconscious. And that's the incident, the last 50 seconds of the, of the, of the fight. And my gosh, I got knocked unconscious and like with a possible chance of a draw or maybe winning to fight, I don't know.
[00:18:29] I'm gone, you know, in one shot cause and like, Oh, you didn't even know that it had happened oversaw badly, you know, knocked unconscious that I actually only realized what had actually happened. Um, about 45 minutes later when my eyebrow was being stitched together. And in the back of the, in the back of the stadium and, you know, and so the doctor was like, you know, apparently for the, for the, for the, for that [00:19:00] time, I was asking if he were having a good time, because I thought it was my birthday party.
[00:19:04] You know, I bet I said that on my podcast. And it's just, it just gives you an idea of how far of reality I was, you know, and, um, just didn't feel right for weeks afterwards, actually, to be honest. And, um, I, I really. Um, Jesus. Yeah. I just really fell into an awful depression afterwards to be honest. Um, I think it was a lot of different, um, aspects of it, bad concussion, um, which is always really bad for your mental stage.
[00:19:38] Um, and I just felt like, I felt like I had lost, like, you know, some, it was like a member of the family almost. You know, and it was something so for familiar to me, and it had been my, my friend and my own way of like validating myself for so long. And it was just gone in an instant and people were like, Oh, it's, you know, it's [00:20:00] one last, it's one Narcos.
[00:20:01] But it was just to me, uh, I just don't think that I was mentally in the position to think about it in that way. Or do you think. Oh, yes. 100%. I was grieving the last day I was grieving the loss itself, but I was also grieving the last time boxing. Cause I'd lost it. Then
[00:20:23] Noel: [00:20:23] if identity attached though, as well as a thing called disenfranchised grief.
[00:20:26] So it's basically it's grief that you quote unquote shouldn't feel, um, You know, other than the obvious grief of someone passing away, like you've got so much loaded into that. That's, that's my identity. That's who I am. This th th this Thai boxing, this, this particular macho, you know, everything's there, you've got, you're walking in without an, and then that's what happened.
[00:20:49] That's what can happen, you know, if
[00:20:50] Conor: [00:20:50] you call it in. Yeah, just a house carrots, man just fell down. It was, it was, it was really on tender hooks. Anyway. It was like, you know what? It was very, it was a very tentative [00:21:00] kind of hold that I had over it. Anyway, because even Jordan like tell you boxing, like you'd have to imagine it took from every single aspect of my life.
[00:21:08] It actually took a lot from me. And that's why I think I lasted after the fight. Well, last time boxing was because it was like something that was sapping more out of me than giving me anything. It was just, I couldn't have a proper relationship. I couldn't, you know, have a proper fucking social life, you know, I could properly, you know, set my fees into anything because it was constantly, constantly thinking about, is this going to make you a better fighter, you know, is going out, drinking with your friends here and I'm going to be good for your training.
[00:21:40] Is is having this, you know, native watching a movie and eating shit food with your girlfriend, going to help you with your fighting. You know what I mean? And it was just, it constantly played on my mind. So I kind of cleaned it up. Got angry. Tell you boxing as if it was a Parson. I was like, how fucking dare you?
[00:21:57] Like, you know, I've given you fucking everything for [00:22:00] Spock in six years, and this is how you fucking show me, you know what I mean? That's that you're farming. You know what I mean? And yeah, it really was, it was told for me to fucking talk about for years afterwards, you know, like, um, it really was, it was tough.
[00:22:15] We talk about, and the last stop we talk about Thai boxing at all. Um, I just completely past it. I
[00:22:23] Dan: [00:22:23] think it is so hard, especially with fighting, uh, in terms of like, if you're to compare it to like a loss in, in like a bloodsport to a loss in, in like a, like something like, like, like hurling a football, like, you know, if you lose a guy match, right, you get to go again the next week and you get to get that redemption, you know, whereas if you lose a fight and you put couple of months of a fight camp in like that corner, like you said, Every aspect.
[00:22:47] And I'm not saying you don't an elder sports, they don't put every aspect of their lives. Absolutely they do. But the onus is on you at the end of the day. And when you come at it from a loss, it's not as if you can just like, yeah, okay, we'll go again. But it could be months before you [00:23:00] get that chance. So that, that guilt and that grief is weighing on you pronounced this amount
[00:23:04] Conor: [00:23:04] of time, eight weeks before you can ever take a shot again, you know, before we can do it again, because you've got back tobacco caution, you know, it's like, you know, you've got like.
[00:23:14] The thing that I have realized about my body, true ultra ultra endurance is how fucking long it takes to actually recover. You might feel perfectly fine. Your body doesn't lie to you. It keeps the focus in score for yet. You know what I mean? And it does not fucking like. That's that's what I really realized in, in, in my time in ultra looking back, I tell you boxing, I never gave myself that proper chance to really recover, you know, and when you've had such a fucking terrible concussion, like that can take months and months, like six to eight months before you should ever fucking take a shot in the head again, you know, w w when it's your own fucking thing that you're calling on, if your identity you're just itching to get back in every time, you know what I mean?
[00:23:58] And then. Always [00:24:00] stay with it. Don't always stay, but I stay until you boxing. I went back to the box and two times I went back to the boxing four years later, I moved over to tell you lamps, you know what I mean, to give it another shot? Like it was just, it was. Um, and at that time, if you would, if you, if you had sat me down at that time, you know, in 2017, And you said, Connor, are you actually doing this because you really want to do it.
[00:24:23] Like you really feel it. This is what you should be doing with your life right now, are you doing it? Because you tink your chase and, you know, pass ghosts or your chase and don't this, you know, is on trans stolen or something. And if it's happening right then and there, like, Oh yeah, I know this is what I want to do.
[00:24:40] That's what I want to do is like, this is how I want to live. You know, I want to go over and give it this shot. And, you know, I didn't realize that I actually got there, you know, that I was making that I was making mistake and, and, you know, I look back at all that note and I'm like fucking deleted. I made those mistakes because, [00:25:00] and they've given me some of the best fodder for thought that I've ever had.
[00:25:04] And what they've made me really, really stroke this time, um, in, you know, I suppose my own introspection, my own journey of self discovery. Is that I want attach, I'm not going to be an ultra runner. You know, I'm not going to be a runner. I'm not going to be a Mountaineer. I'm not going to be whatever. I'm just going to be Connor.
[00:25:26] And all of these are just facets and they're just extensions of who he is and who I am. So at the end of the day, I'm Connor and that's it. And then. That's that's one thing that I've definitely learned from my time in Thai boxing, for sure. I think
[00:25:41] it's
[00:25:41] Chris: [00:25:41] the only part in the Connor to recognize that, um, I think we should collectively recognize here with the benefit of hindsight, that, that moment, not only did the mind knock you out, but in effect he destroyed one of your personas.
[00:25:54] And I think that grief we perhaps were feeling was, uh, you know, some, some. Uh, [00:26:00] dissipation of the Eagle, you know, you, you had built yourself up to be a fighter, the archetype of the warrior, and all of a sudden you were less, you know, you felt less as a human being because we have this sense of attachment, you know, that's the whole thing in the bag like EDA is that attachment is the root of all suffering.
[00:26:18] Yes. And in essence, it's true. Okay. But I think in your story, this was a pivotal turning point because yes, you went back. You know, in it's analogous to a guy or a girl going back to their previous relationship where it had been cheated on or whatever, because you feel like you remember the good times.
[00:26:37] You don't remember the pain and you, you, you must go back to remember the pain to be able to come back out of it. You know, I think that what I found really interesting about you is from this period of 2013 to 2018, I think the first time you spoke about running, um, on any of your socials was to Sonia Sullivan, Rowan a 10 miler.
[00:26:55] Um, in Cove. Yes. You didn't, you didn't run a marathon in cork city and I, I [00:27:00] want to kind of ask you a project really, to a moment that I thought was just fascinating. So you're, you're, you're at mile 82 of the hundred meter in Connemara. Okay. You stopped at Runestone. I think your buddy is your spotter.
[00:27:11] Then you can correct me if I'm wrong here. And I think you have a moment where not that you feel like you're going to give in, but you have to stop. I think you actually take a nap. Yeah. Could you describe the next 18 miles? Um, and how you were feeling and what happened to you because I think there's a Catholicism that happened there.
[00:27:28] That was just incredible.
[00:27:30] Conor: [00:27:30] Um, man, I think even throat, what I have done an ultra marathon since then, which is a laugh and I've never felt that kind of pain. Yeah. Like since, um, I'm fucking deleted that logo. I did get an opportunity to feel that type of pain, cause no way no, where they can actually stand.
[00:27:52] I know what I can actually stand. They know I definitely was at a very similar point in the patio run. Um, when I was [00:28:00] in the last two hours of the 24 hour patio run, I was in the depths of it. I was like very similar couldn't move my legs properly, barely running. Um, but. My lady too. And Rowan stolen was like, um, I don't know, like if you've ever been at your absolute limit of anything, right.
[00:28:23] Um, let's say you're like cramming for exams. You've been up for fucking, like, you know, you've been studying straight fucking 19 hours are, you've been fucking trying to push yourself to something that's like, if you're digging deep, you were digging deep 10 hours ago. Right. And that was how I felt. When I hit Runestone was like, my body's been forced to fucking dig deep, like 10, 20 fucking times already.
[00:28:47] You know, it's, I don't know, like there's 18 miles, right. Which is, you know, a relatively small, short distance. That's not even a marathon left. And w by the time I had gotten the Runestone, [00:29:00] like the legs were just, they barely were moving. They weren't really, like, my knee was really a hidden gem anymore. It was just a straight leg.
[00:29:07] There was no movement there whatsoever. One of my ankles was just like in an all Merce for the pain. And it was all you had actually, and this is actually sort of strange how the mind works when you're in such bok and agony. And when you're a, so-so so tired and sleep deprived. Oh, you thought that like I had worn away the cartilage in my ankle.
[00:29:26] That I was going to have to have a surgery on us. Cause that's like, I, it actually felt like that it was just bone on bone, that there was no, um, there was no like any, any padding left that I had worn away to that point in my head, I was like, look, it's like, I've done that. No, you know what I mean? I've done it.
[00:29:42] And I'm like, look, I've got AC in my head. I might as well do it because I've already fucked my ankle so much that I'm probably going to need a surgery. What's 80 miles going to do that. You know what I mean? That not doing it is going to do you know what I'm saying? So I had, I had already, I suppose, [00:30:00] put it in my mind.
[00:30:00] Yeah. Ankle is fucked, you know, chop the fucking leg off. Like, you know what I mean? Like the American civil war type shit, or you have an injury, chop it off, you know what I mean? So I just, and I got the Runestone I had saw what's bloated my legs. Like they were just sore swollen, and that I. My friend, put a, put a toll on the ground.
[00:30:20] And like, this is the, this is the type of pain I was in, like getting onto the groans, like laying dome was fucking agony, like absolute agony. He laid down a toll on the back of the, on the concrete, like and open the blue door. And I put, I laid down on the fucking ground and every single parent and my body was buzzing with fucking tension and pain.
[00:30:44] And he lifted up my legs by the ankles. And I actually remember like screaming, like, like screaming in pain and he just put them up on top of the care and just try and get some blood out of my legs, you know, to try and get them going again. And. [00:31:00] Um, I got a cup of coffee off of one of the, one of these people that were just, Oh, helping the runners and stuff like that.
[00:31:06] Just, you know, the locals were very, very, very, very good. And, uh, I just had to sip in this cup of coffee and it like half, it was just running down my chin and the half was going into my mode. It was like this kind of cold coffee. And I was like trying to get it into me, like, you know, and I just like, just didn't have a fucking clue how it was going to be able to do it, but my friend pulled me up anyway.
[00:31:26] And, um, Sat me into the car. And, uh, I just like picked up my two legs and like put them into the, put them into the car. And I was just about to close the door and I goes and wake me up at half four. He's like, well, my team is at, it's like it's four 27. He's waking up at half four and I just close, close the door.
[00:31:49] And it wasn't like that. Like literally it was like, boom, blink. And I was, you know, up again. Saturday, getting wraps on the fucking window. Took me about another [00:32:00] 40 minutes to actually just get out of the car and trying to move again. It was like, um, the best way that I can describe it as like someone shoved the pipe up, my op my keel, right.
[00:32:11] Or both of my heels, and both of these pipes mesh at the end of my back. And then they moved up to my neck. So it was like,
[00:32:20] Dan: [00:32:20] it was just a second. Yeah. It was
[00:32:23] Conor: [00:32:23] like, we were talking about the walking dead before we came on, uh, the running dead man, all man. And this was just the most, the crap that I've ever felt in my life.
[00:32:35] And I just started to move again, move it up again, moving up. And then, you know, you kind of like. I can do it. I know it's grand. Fuck. This fucking ankle ankle was in bed and the other ankle had strapped up. Didn't have enough strap in for one. So it was like, Oh, just have to focus. Sacrifice one was your favorite it's yeah.
[00:32:53] It's like choosing from your children. Like, you know what I mean? Um, I know you just, I just had to move and again, and I remember [00:33:00] one point. Um, cause it was it's coming tomorrow. It was coming tomorrow, you know, it was August. So it was going to be brilliant, like half six or, you know, quarter seven, seven o'clock.
[00:33:09] And um, so it was still in the nighttime and it was like the biggest Hill that I was going to go to. Right. And I started up this Hill and then I started fucking falling backwards. I couldn't think. And. This is again, this whole self accountability thing. My body stacked as to try and stop me from falling down.
[00:33:31] And I was like, no, fucking leave me alone. Don't fucking touch me. Like if I fall back, I have to fucking fall back and I have to fucking make it forward. If I, you know, if I, if I, if you pushed me one step, always taking a step fucking backwards. Cause if I cross the lane and I haven't done it, you know, under my own steam fully, like even once there.
[00:33:49] And then he was like, it was like y'all. I was like, I was really, really tense. Like I was really, you know, I, I very like tension and, uh, making it up that fucking Hill, man. I [00:34:00] got to the top of it and I was like, I couldn't stop anymore. I was just like, I have to like have to just, there was 18 miles there to do like, can't stop again.
[00:34:07] Like, cause it was just. It was going to be too hard to get going again. So I just kept going and kept going. And I remember it so fucking funny. It's so funny thinking back at these times, like, cause they're terrifying, like, you know,
[00:34:21] Dan: [00:34:21] yeah, this is, this is falling off this particular
[00:34:25] Conor: [00:34:25] path. That's really funny because it's actually funny that you said, mentioned Clifton before we came in, because that's where it finishes, you know, that's where it's there.
[00:34:35] And, um, the sign said Clifton six kilometers. Right. And I was like fucking business. So I walked on for another like kilometer and this car comes bast and he goes, Only 10 kilometers left. Why do you follow the dog? He said, fuck you to [00:35:00] motive it. Like, you know, Kara was passing out just being your good Samaritan or whatever, like you fucking get any fucking day.
[00:35:09] Well, I forgot that when you get to fucking Clifton, you have to do three loops of Clifton to finish. So you actually pass the finish line four times. Which I think is the most fucked up thing ever, whoever taught, you know, fair play it yet because that's actually popped up, but you'll get there anyway and you have to do three loops and, uh, Jesus Christ, man, like you're 10, you think it's tree loops.
[00:35:33] That loop is a mile. It's like it's tree fucking loops. Like how hard is this going to be? It's tree loops. It's a Mo you know exactly where you're going to and from. I'm telling you, man, that was fucking office fucking three miles
[00:35:46] Dan: [00:35:46] it's it's so it man, it's w it's like that when it's like, you're given a taste, I was like, this is it.
[00:35:51] This is, this is over. And then no, it's not. I do that. I did the Camino there a couple of years ago, like six weeks, one, and to Spain, to the other and the guide, the guide they give you, man, [00:36:00] like it's a, it's like a, it's the closest thing to a meme that they have on a, on a wall. I tells them Commodore walk, you know?
[00:36:06] And it's like, it'll tell you like, all right, You're going from here. This today's route is from here to here and it's, you know, 20 kilometers and I'm not even joking. We, we did, I think it was Riverdale to another. I can't remember the name of the town. Riverdale was the time we started it and the guy told us it was 24 kilometers to the next town.
[00:36:22] We're to God. It's an easy day, you know, a couple of nights, nice walk in the sun. And like, I remember 42 kilometers later, we were still walking. I like how it takes. I don't know if the roads get longer in Spain each year, but it was drastically, but like, you'd see, you'd see, they'd be like, Oh, here we are.
[00:36:41] On the map. Roni five kilometers away, like three hours later. You're still not there. Oh, man. The wait in the back, the sun beaten down. You've run out of water two hours ago.
[00:36:52] Conor: [00:36:52] Yeah, it's terrible, man. It's terrible when you're, when you think you're close and you think, yes, you know, I'm fucking see you the lead on the [00:37:00] horizon here and, uh, yeah.
[00:37:02] Horribleness in suits
[00:37:05] Noel: [00:37:05] as well,
[00:37:08] Chris: [00:37:08] but sorry. Can I just point out though to the audience, if they don't understand you went from running, um, A marathon, which is 26 miles to a hundred loiter on an impulse. Like you had a conversation with a buddy and you went, ah, a hundred meter. We don't, uh, we don't sign up.
[00:37:29] We're never going to do it. Okay. Yes. So I just want to point out that, like, you know, yeah. My 82 to point into my at a hundred, um, it sounds difficult, but, um, You went from Harrison
[00:37:44] Conor: [00:37:44] far? Like, you know, like far, like once I hit kilometer 43, I was in uncharted waters. You know what I mean? And, uh, didn't really know where it was going to go.
[00:37:53] I remember hitting a hundred kilometers. I'm being like nearly finished. Yeah. Only 62 lifts. So [00:38:00] that's a marathon 20 K. So it's a marathon and a half marathon. Really? You know what I mean? And like when you, when I, when I, when I think back to it, like, um, it was 28 hours, but it seemed like longer. And like that's a long time, but it seemed like longer.
[00:38:16] It just seemed like, uh, you know, there was points in telling him there, like where you're like, just, just for instance, the last three and the last three miles took me. Uh, I know we're in 12 minutes. Like, you know what I mean, an over in 12 minutes to do treat my list. Like it was, it was so, so difficult.
[00:38:36] Like, uh, you're, you're limping. Like I was limping. I was like, like, you know, you got a fucking bad slate tackling in your, in a game of flavor. So you, then you're limping around the place. It's that for fucking hours, you know? So you're like my whole body then. Because it was limping. My back was spasming so bad.
[00:38:54] The, I had to get down into like Chileans pose, yoga, like child's pose every like, [00:39:00] can like, you know, copping a millions because my back was, was cramping up so bad. It felt like, um, Probably another fantastic description here for you. It felt like my head and my ass were trying to like talk to each other.
[00:39:14] It was like you were leaning back like that. I could to like, keep my, keep my back straight. It was actually like, it was incredible. I remember in that 67, uh, checkpoint, like S like C, like going into Paul is in a fucking restaurant, like in a restaurant, like. I have to go to the bathroom. So I have to go into the restaurant to use the bathroom and then like came out and walked back over and I actually have to stop right then and there and get into, as far as people walking around me, like someone stepped on my fingers.
[00:39:46] Like it was just, it was awful. The man, it was awful.
[00:39:49] Dan: [00:39:49] For the uninitiated right now, obviously I, myself, a great runner up ultra marathons kind of, you know, multiple titles, you know, but, uh, yeah, for the [00:40:00] uninitiated. Right. Explain how this works. And so it's you said it was 28 hours long? Yes. So do you, do you do like X amount of kilometers, then you get a break and food or.
[00:40:12] Or do you do it over it? An all in one go like, Oh, I did it again
[00:40:16] Conor: [00:40:16] and again, um, the next year. Right. And it was, it kind of probably went a lot more the way it's meant to go. Cause I had done a lot more training and I had wrote the 200 mile run since. Um, so like I built up the mileage on my legs and, um, Um, I, I kind of, you know, I suppose figure it out how to, you know, attack Stickley approach, an ultra marathon, you know, where it's like, you know, there's a lot in it.
[00:40:39] Like, you know, what you do is like the first checkpoint is just after the marathon, man. It's like 27 and a half miles in that's the first checkpoint, second checkpoint is 55 miles in and Oh, you actually knew I was in trouble on the way to that checkpoint for the first [00:41:00] time. Um, well, you fucking need, you just didn't look like a knee anymore.
[00:41:03] It was horrific looking. Um, and uh, that same ankle was, was destroyed and that was the ankle. Then I decided to strap up. But then like the body is, is the body is built to be the way it's meant to be. So if you strap up one side, the other side is going to stack, take in a bit more stress. So that's what happens to the other ankle.
[00:41:23] And that's why I thought that my current Lynch was gone. Cause it was just so bad. So yeah. Then you get to mile 55, then you've got a sharpshooter, um, break then million 55 tomorrow 67 is your next one. You have to hit them. There's time requirements on each of these. Right. So I just got in to the 67 miles, like Justin, how long do you take at each one?
[00:41:48] Um, like for my first one, I took way too long. Uh, I probably took about 15 minutes, maybe 15 minutes. Yeah. 15 that's way too long. Yeah. Cause like you [00:42:00] once. You want your turnaround time? If you're racing, like if like this next time that I do an ultra marathon, no is going to probably be carried away. I'll try in September.
[00:42:09] I'll probably be like, Grab and go type of job, like two, three minutes, four minutes, max, you know, um, because I'd be raising it and I'd be wanting to at least get top three. So it's, um, it's completely different to just trying to finish the race where you're like, you know, a take and you're telling him to, you know, check out all your ailments, if you need to change socks or whatever the case may be.
[00:42:29] If you put on a layer, take off a layer, change your half, whatever, you know? So you, you, you have plenty to do audit all those things. So, yeah, I was taking 15, 20 minutes at a time. The checkpoint at mile 55, I really thought I was going to actually quit. Um, are you sitting in the back of the carrier and the supermax?
[00:42:46] And I was like trying to bite into this thing and you like, it's so weird. It was like fucking delicious burger. And I had zero appetite. It was just like trying to force, feed myself. Cause my body was just like, Are you trying to kill us? You know, it's like, [00:43:00] there's easier ways of doing
[00:43:01] Noel: [00:43:01] this. Yeah. Oh, that's what I find amazing.
[00:43:03] Like if they could be Lincoln, a couple of things in together, they're like th the loss and the way that, the way of the last year with it, with the, with the title fight, kind of, you know, you had the scan and then moving over to, you know, scanning on the brain and then told now don't fight. And then I'm going to fight.
[00:43:18] Anyway, when we go over to Thailand. Then does that you said there, but your friend, just what, he touched her with his, about to touch her. And you're saying, Oh, get away from me. Just like the drive that's in you. And the reason for that drive. So the reasoning for far to keep going to, to put yourself through these things to, and that's like, it's.
[00:43:37] Drive can be great, but it's trying to understand where that drive is coming from. Is it a healthy drive where, cause it's, what's it called? This, this drove me to this point. It was like, yeah, that's not a good point to be, to be there. You know what I mean?
[00:43:48] Conor: [00:43:48] I think the driver was definitely over that time was Eagle for a lot of it.
[00:43:53] And I think that I was. And this is still an element, like a smaller element in my, [00:44:00] uh, in my ultra running and TRO every aspect of my life is, um, there's an element of, I don't want to listen to that voice of failure that, cause it's so hard on me to know it's fucking, like, I hold myself to a high standard.
[00:44:14] So, you know, Just, uh, an opportunity for that voice to creep in is, is a failure. Like, you know, so when I, when I, um, like, just for instance, I did my marathon personal, the best attempt, um, on or during the week. And I really actually figured out that I'm making serious, that I had made serious strides, um, in this more compassionate, positive outlook on failure.
[00:44:40] And like really fucking, just being honest with myself that I had given everything to it and come up shot, you know? But back then, like the physical pain is sore, linear and understandable. And like it's, you know, it can be healed with pills and with [00:45:00] bandages and all these things that if I had failed to do it and I had, and I had to deal with the voice that Neagle.
[00:45:09] That Eagle was saying, like, what the fuck you doing? Like, you're just like, you didn't fucking give it all you had more in yet. You could have went more or whatever the case would be. I felt like at that time, you know, in that, in that ultra marathon, I was taking the swollen knee and the possible ankle surgery, uh, all over the negative voice.
[00:45:28] Whereas no, it's like. For me, it doesn't matter wash. It doesn't matter what anybody else would think about what I'm doing and more so it just matters about my own inner dialogue with things. And that, that really played a parent in me finishing the 200 miler. It really played apparent to me finishing the pass.
[00:45:48] You all run. And in the 200 miler after that a hundred milliliters. So like when I finished that off that a hundred mile run. How I really knew that I was doing it for the external and not [00:46:00] for me. And I was really doing it for this thing of look at Connor. He's a beast kind of type of, uh, uh, you know, approach to it and not, you know, Doing it as a personal statement to myself was I didn't fucking, you know, I didn't run or take care of myself at all.
[00:46:16] After that fit, after that Ray is finished. So I just started drinking again. I really started drinking really heavily from August of that year, all the way through to the end of December that year, I think I had probably. My most drink field filled months nearly of my life. I'd say like, you know, a lot of different things came about at that time.
[00:46:34] Like my, uh, my brother is stag and my brother's wedding, Christmas loads, different things, just kind of stacked on each order. And I really just leaned on alcohol because I don't think I was, you know, I don't think I was ready to, you know, I thought that like this hundred mile run was going to like ignite something in me and it hadn't.
[00:46:51] And I, you know, I just really felt like it was. You know that, although it's succeeded in finishing the race, I had [00:47:00] failed in its motive, its motive behind the race was to give myself the sense of direction, the sense of like, you know, who I am, maybe, you know, and I had failed to do that. So then I was on this map track then, you know, for, for four months of just, just abusing myself really, you know, and that negative voice comes in and that ego comes in.
[00:47:20] Um, and. When I decided that I was going to not only, you know, Rodney's Fotomat races and punish myself in that way, but I was also going to actually, you know, try and figure out who the fuck I am, um, in the, in the coming years. Um,
[00:47:41] Chris: [00:47:41] there's a very calling into moment, I think, in your story. So this seems to me like there's kind of a, a crescendo happening here okay.
[00:47:50] To a climax. Um, and I don't think it's the climax you think it is? Oh, I feel like there's a climax that we'll get to, but there's a moment in you go through this period. You [00:48:00] call your second date of birth. Okay. It's January, 2019, which I think is brilliant. You have this moment of rebirth. You've come out of the wilderness years.
[00:48:08] You feel like a reborn and you during the period between January and February. I think you have a drink or two and on February in February, I think that there's a specific date. It's February, 2019. You're a few hundred meters into a kind of a 20 K run or whatever. And your earphones die. Yes. And you're an introspective guy now.
[00:48:30] So when I listened to you, I think you are emotionally immature. You're emotionally intelligent. You are able to intelligently explain how you feel and you know, these manifestations of your Eagle and. Um, you know, the do duality to your personality, you talk about RONIC and Connor and, and, you know, these are, these are fascinating, but I feel like there's a moment here in stones that I was in 19.
[00:48:53] Your battery goes in your earphones and you have kind of an epiphany and you described the epiphany.
[00:48:58] Conor: [00:48:58] Yeah, I think with, [00:49:00] um, with, with any epiphany, cause I've, I've had a few of them, I think, over the, over the course of my life or whatever, but I think that this was like, Um, I was creating the foundation for this to happen, you know?
[00:49:13] Uh, w where unconsciously, perhaps, you know what I mean? Um, like I had started the year basically, like saying to myself, you can fucking keep living like this. I mean, you know, you can't let keep living like this and. You know, like everybody was just seeking this change. And I was fucking tired of looking on the outside for it.
[00:49:33] Like, you know, I was actually tired of like looking for marathons or hundred mile runs or Irish titles or whatever the fuck was going to be. So I really just wanted to fucking search from within myself and then try and fucking dose, you know, what I actually wanted. And so I did the external things that I usually do when I need, when I want to change things open.
[00:49:56] That is like, you know, I stopped drinking. I, you know, my diet gets [00:50:00] better. I start training. I do all of these things and usually it falls off. You usually there's something happens is apparently there's just too good to turn though. And that turns into treat his drinking and then such and such and such and falls down like that.
[00:50:16] And. What, what actually happened was, um, I had my first drink of 2019 and I had Manny Manny drinks, um, that night. And I wake up not have a clue what happened past, I didn't even know where I was and walking a, the road. Oh, you had a far different like inner dialogue, whereas before I'd have been literally beating the shit out of my, as far, letting myself dome like that.
[00:50:45] And I suppose just being a fucking general disappointment and like hope fucking, you know, you can never stick to this. What are you just like, you're never going to be on this track, never be on this road. And at, happening back to the tell you about 10 days when I was living like a monk and living this kind of fucking, you know, [00:51:00] this lifestyle where everything was regimented and never being able to attain that again, because he was saying like, you know, when you look at these things through Rose tinted glasses, we only look at the good times.
[00:51:09] And the times when you were really feeling it, like, you know, when you're in this flow stage, And that was a change for me. And then three days later, or three or four days later, I go for that run. Um, and I think it was like I'm going to run 30 kilometers because I'm after fucking making such a full control of my says.
[00:51:29] And, uh, all of these things, it didn't really have a, have a, a very, you know, compassionate data minded staff that it's run, but it really fed into what I was talking about that day. I remember it very fucking well. It was a really, really cold, cold, cold February morning. It was a 4:00 AM and I just pulled it outside.
[00:51:50] Oh, I'll tell you the Kings of the Autel it's that's my gym. So I go for show her there before I go to work. Then after my run and I run out towards violin colleague and all jokes [00:52:00] back through, it would usually be about 26 or seven kilometers and I'd finish it off then insight and tone and. I started writing with my headphones in like you did every single morning.
[00:52:12] And did I eat I ordered BBU inside my ears and it was really quiet. We'd be really coy. As all of a sudden, I remember taking the headphones out of my pocket and putting them into my little kind of poach and I'm Oh, sorry. I've taken a motor my ears and just . Asked him, like, why, you know, why are we actually doing this?
[00:52:36] Like, you know what I mean, are you doing this? Because, you know, you feel like this is another thing that you're wanting to fucking try and do, and they were going to fall off. And this is just another box. So you're going to have plenty to take, to get you onto this fucking track or what are you going to, you know, what, why are you doing this?
[00:52:53] And. Oh, it just went to both answering those questions. And then when I started to think back at all [00:53:00] of the different times that I had tried to get my life back on track return and tell you boxing and doing all of these things, I was looking at it in a completely different view. I was like not giving myself this fucking hair, tell him to beat the shit out of myself, but more just accepting that these things happened.
[00:53:16] And accepted that we made those choices and we, we decided to do those things at that time. Cause that's what, you know, we went with the best information we had at the time and we made our choices because of that. And when I started to do that and get more comfortable with that, I realized that like, it was just going to make an offer the difference into how it was going to view myself.
[00:53:38] And when I was going to start viewing myself better, The internal better, the external was going to benefit from that. And that was where, you know, I was no longer doing. I was no longer staying, you know, on a track to do this race. I was. Living the life that I wanted to live for me for Connor and, uh, what I thought was best for him and [00:54:00] what I think is best for him every day.
[00:54:01] No, you know, and fuck it. Look man, flip off every now and then. And we just, we find her says at the end of the day, I'll use borrow note of our scholars from our phones. We've eaten shit food. We haven't gotten move, ruined the place and haven't drank enough water. And don't, you know, we haven't felt like we've, you know, treated us as property that day.
[00:54:18] But, you know, on the flip side of that, the new Connor is more compassionate, you know, and actually realize that you're fucking human. Like, no, you're not going to be on the ball all the time. That's another thing that was new. So when I had those, when I, when I had that morning and that chart two kilometer run, there was a lot of time there to just, you know, and pick a few bones of myself, you know, and actually just fucking discuss some stuff with myself.
[00:54:44] Chris: [00:54:44] No, I think this is incredibly important in your story because physiologically yes. You know, running a hundred miles and then you went on to do the endurer mind. Um, uh, you had that year in 2019. So this, this out of work or physical work, uh, was [00:55:00] obviously working for you. Okay. You went from running a marathon to a hundred minor to a 200 miner in the space of a year.
[00:55:05] I don't know anyone who's done something like that. Great. Which is amazing. But I'm far more interested in your psychology, which is why I pinpoint this moment. Okay. And I think the story of the German race is well-told you did it under 60 hours. It was an amazing achievement, but I feel like every show you're ever going to go on, they're going to ask you about that question.
[00:55:24] There's another specific moment that I was listening to one of your shows. Um, and I was on a walk and, uh, I actually started the Croix. Okay. Because you were speaking about, uh, it was the next day or perhaps after the race and you go to sit down for dinner with your dad and you, you speak about your dad a lot as do I.
[00:55:48] Okay. Obviously he is, uh, a person. You look up to a person you benchmark yourself on, and this moment, this culmination of you've gone through that moment in [00:56:00] February, where. You go hold on a second. Like I can do all these amazing things and I still drink, but I'm not doing any of the inner work. And you come to this point after the race in may and you sit down for dinner and your dad looks across at ya and he puts his hand in your lap.
[00:56:16] Can you describe what you felt at that moment and why all of this inner work came to manifest in this moment for you and him? Obviously?
[00:56:26] Conor: [00:56:26] Peace camp just really like a type of cam that I don't think I had ever actually used before that time. And when big achievements had come in the past and I really rode the crest of it and like, felt up here, but also feel like what's next.
[00:56:46] And you know, you know, where are we going to go and all this kind of stuff. Whereas for me, and at that time, I was just like, I realized that before or after the race or whatever way the race was going to go or [00:57:00] whatever the, of the race went, that I was happy with who I was. And finally just like, just really realize that I think I realized it before the race even standards.
[00:57:13] And that is probably, you know, one of the reasons why I was able to actually finish the race was. Just being very, very comfortable with myself and who I am. And, uh, that moment for me was, you know, it was really like opening the doors to this being my life and not just some sort of a flash in the pan type of thing, because it was common from within myself.
[00:57:40] And even during the race, I speak about this on the latest episode of my own podcast. Um, during the race, you know, uh, when I was given the 24 overs, right? Uh, when, when the, when the race organizer said to me, you are 23 and a half hours there. And no, if you do 70 meter loop, a [00:58:00] 17 minute loops, you'll finish the race with 15 minutes to spare.
[00:58:03] And then. You know, a couple of the loops after that, he came back off of me and said, look harder, look, if you need an extra hour or two hours to finish the race, like we give it to you. You know, we we'll hang on. We keep the Tony for school and then we will we'll, you know, you can still finish the race or whatever the case may be.
[00:58:19] And I remember like leaving the conversation and my dad was there holding a water bottle and as we were kind of running to get her away from it and I go, we're not fucking finishing this thing in 61 or 62 hours. I fucking gave me or no to fucking finish it in 60 hours. It was the star. No, I stacked the race as a 60 hour race.
[00:58:35] It's not finishing a 61 or 62 over race. It's going to be a 60 hour raise because that's how you felt is the same way as fighting the best guy in the country. It was, that was how I felt about it was . Uh, that, you know, I'm going to fucking finish why they Stanford Bush. What that actually was saying to me was, I'm not doing it for the trophy.
[00:58:58] I'm not doing it for that [00:59:00] 200 miles to finish our t-shirt. I'm not doing it far. And for anything else, I'm not doing it for, you know, putting it up on Instagram or the past, send it back. I'm just doing it because I actually feel like this is something that I can do now. I like that self-belief was not there before.
[00:59:18] Um, and you know, fostering that from within myself is, was kind of letting me know that it was actually not doing this for an anybody else other than myself.
[00:59:28] Chris: [00:59:28] And I think that's so important because let me press this, um, the next question with the kind of anecdote on my own. So I, you know, still I'm a workaholic, um, and I've been in therapy with NOLA for, you know, going on five years now.
[00:59:47] And we discuss, um, you know, locus of control and, and, uh, validation a lot. And the reason I think that I, I cried when I was listening to you is because, um, I have a very strong [01:00:00] relationship with my father and both my parents, um, you know, a very loving relationship, but my father is a very impressive guy.
[01:00:06] He's a very powerful guy. Um, and he's a fantastic entrepreneur. And I feel like in that moment, when you were talking about that, Kind of reciprocal sense of respect that you had for each other? I think like for, for me, I went through a stage of, I had to decide that I'm not trying to impress, you know, uh, my dad anymore are, I'm not trying to impress my peers anymore.
[01:00:31] I have to like look in the mirror and I actually went through a stage where, uh, you know, after shower every morning, I'd write in the fog of the mirror. Who are you trying to impress? Because if, if I wasn't able to answer in the mirror, looking at myself that. You're trying to impress yourself, Chris, then I'm failing.
[01:00:48] And I feel like that moment, you know, happened for you right there. And it just, I think it touched me because I had gone through that exact same, [01:01:00] um, you know, I don't want to call it an epiphany, but I think it's a cliche. It was just a moment where you realize, look, I'm doing this. Um, for me, you know, I'm not doing this because I want it to be.
[01:01:10] The ultra runner. I've done a lot of things in my life where I did them because I wanted to be a rugby player or I wanted to be a whatever, you know, a businessman I wanted to play business, you know, doing businesses damn heart every day is a grind doing the work to be an ultra marathon runner is damn hard.
[01:01:28] Okay. Nobody really cares about the work. They care about the culmination of the work. When you were on 200 miles, we just breezed over. Uh, the fact that you ran 200 miles in under 60 hours, it's insane to even think about it. Okay. But these are narratives and humans love stories, but they also love these emotional pieces, which is why I feel like this.
[01:01:49] Particular moment resonated with me so strongly. And I think why I want to, you know, one really interesting thing about your stories that you called the period of time, time, [01:02:00] um, from a younger guy to that rebirth in, in, uh, 2019 and Johnny 2019 as the wilderness years. And to me, the wilderness has connotations of like freedom and, you know, airiness and you're outside, et cetera.
[01:02:13] Um, And to you, it seemed to have connotations of kind of like a rabbit beast that like, you know, it was just running wild. So it'd be like, I feel like there's a moment in time for you now where we can reclassify the wild. Like it's almost like rewilding, like return returning to yourself and returning home.
[01:02:30] And you're rewilding, you're, you're in nature all the time, but it's a different, um, you've got different emotions attached to it
[01:02:38] Conor: [01:02:38] where I think the, the wilderness kind of fits in and this is like, The wilderness is a dangerous place. If you don't know what you're doing, and if you know, if you're out in the wilderness, you don't have a compass, a head torch, proper gear, you can get fucked up.
[01:02:56] Um, and it's the same way you think as well with life? [01:03:00] Um, if you're, if I, if I was to, I really just didn't want to be a, you know, a bystander of my life. And when I think about the wilderness years, I really was, you know, Heading through swamps and forests of my own life with no sense of direction. Um, and that's, I think where I'm pulling the wilderness from, and the wilderness can also present like times of, you know, of great beauty and grit and euphoria and oneness.
[01:03:33] Um, and I feel like that's as well, another part of this whole thing, because there has to be a certain element of a lure for you to stay somewhere for you to stay in that moment of time. So there was parents of the wilderness years, parents of that time, when I had, you know, fulfillment validation, I had, you know, elements of those things.
[01:03:55] But it was, again, it was coming from the wilderness itself. It was coming [01:04:00] from the external, it was coming from what I was actually going through in my day to day. At least not from me being, you know, projected outwards. Um, and no, I still feel like I'm in, I'm in a wilderness, you know, as we all are, I think life is chaotic and leaf is full of ups and downs and ins and outs.
[01:04:20] And, um, No that I have done Icefall is a lot more introspection and a lot more to come. And I feel like I will have, you know, multiple times where I'll call on my cell phone on my own bullshit. I re I feel like I have a compass in my hand, and I have a head torch and I have these things that are going to help me to do that.
[01:04:40] And it, and it's the same wilderness. It's the same landscape. I just think I may be better prepared to go through it and fuck it here. Every, you know, every now and then. The compass gets shoved into the, you know, today and to end the, the bag and, you know, you forget wherever it is and things happen and leaf is that chaos [01:05:00] and that wilderness and that you step in a fucking hole or you twist your ankle or you, whatever the case may be, whatever analogy you want to use.
[01:05:07] There are times where, um, your, your savior can be, you know, the other side as well can be, um, can be something that can drag you down. And so. Yeah, I feel like I'm still in the wilderness. Um, but where I, where I say the wilderness years when I was in there, where I had absolutely no idea of our sense of direction.
[01:05:28] Noel: [01:05:28] There's a couple of things to keep going on. Sorry, Chris. There's a couple of things that keep coming up throughout the kind of, um, trails, the word story doesn't do you, justice is in your life. What's it been gone there? I suppose then it's, you know, all the things that you were doing. You know, their coping mechanisms and that's what we essentially, lots of us do.
[01:05:48] We like to catch you the day we have coping mechanisms to cope with our day, but it depends on what you said there, the world that is it's the same world, and this is just the way I'm seeing it now. And that's, you know, I [01:06:00] I'd see a lot of people. Where they use coping mechanisms and the coping mechanism could be drugs or alcohol or unhealthy, what would be classified as other unhealthy behaviors are.
[01:06:10] And that could be taught the way they think and talk about themselves. But it's, it's about transferring that and it's kind of accepting ourselves that, you know, what all I'm trying to do is just get through the day. In hindsight, when I look back, it's like, Oh, you know what, actually, that wasn't maybe great.
[01:06:24] And maybe I suppose that's what you're realizing over the, over the, over this time, it was like maybe those coping mechanisms. Weren't great, but I can still use coping mechanisms, but I'm just going to use these ones. And the great thing that I'm getting from that, that I've seen that I'm seeing from that is, is your locus of evaluation has changing.
[01:06:43] As changed as in, so your locus of evaluation for those, it's your locus, where, where something comes from in your evaluation, where you evaluate yourself. So very simply put we've got an internal, external locus of evaluation, external being I'm okay, because you say I'm okay. Which is, I suppose [01:07:00] what we see there it's you said diversity training that I'll get the title are, people are like this because, you know, so.
[01:07:05] So that's why I'll train this hard to get the total, what they'll think the external, whereas you're getting into that place where it's the internal I'm going to do this. I'm okay. Because Connor says it's okay. I can still have the drive and the want and the kind of, the bit of competition there. I think that's, that's really important to you.
[01:07:20] I I've heard Johnny Wilkinson talk about it, a lot of changing and he still has the competitive nature, but it's enough, much. Different way, like you said, it's coming back to that, to the re to the wilderness. It's the same wilderness, but I'm experiencing it in such a different way. Now it's just the affair.
[01:07:37] Like it's just opening up and like, it's like, Oh my God, that w w was that, was that always there? Or? Yeah, it's like, you're, you're the blinkers are being taken
[01:07:46] Conor: [01:07:46] off. I feel like it's like, uh, it's like fire, you know, like fire can like be red. It can keep you warm and I can cook your food for you. But at the other end of it as well, it can fucking burn you.
[01:07:56] Don't. And if you don't watch it, you know, [01:08:00] and I, I feel like that's like my own, my own sense of, uh, self accountability and my own like want and desire to get the best out of myself is what I pull off with. No, you know what I mean, far for when I want to push to do something in the external and whatever that may be, you know, whether it be a run or whether it be, um, writing an essay or, you know, talking to a company.
[01:08:23] You know, it's, um, it's just about getting the best out of myself, but yeah, the, the, the law, his evaluation was completely awfully external from my lip for a lot of my life. And there are still, you know, I'm not naive enough to think that like I've completely and utterly gotten rid of that aspect of myself.
[01:08:43] I think that that will be, you know, play a smaller role in my life throughout, you know, um, for sure, like. Yeah, exactly. And I, and I, and I suppose, yeah, being packed of the Troy, you've been accepted by the Troy. You've been accepted by the people that, you know what I mean? And that's, [01:09:00] you know, is to be, is that we want it to be, but we want it to belong.
[01:09:03] You know, we want to be married to something. So, um, That's all, it was going to be a factor there, but like, there are, there are like actual, like experiential. There are evidential points in my life that tells me that I'm I am moving away from the external locus. Like, uh, the, the, the path you'll run was probably one of the biggest exercises and self-accountability I've ever had in my life because there's nobody else there.
[01:09:31] There was nobody else there when then asked two hours like kicked in, because I really focused on the last two hours. Cause it was just really wise. It was the hardest times that I've ever had to actually keep going. There's no one as there no would know if I stopped at 22 hours really. And you know, I just, Oh yeah, I did 24 hours.
[01:09:49] No one would really actually know. And last two hours set in the sun Rose again for the second day, it was really off. I got sunstroke and I was vomiting [01:10:00] into, uh, into a flower bed. Um, every couple of loops and because I couldn't keep anything down, I was trying to drink water to hydrate myself, and I was trying to eat food and Woodstone.
[01:10:12] Um, and like, uh, it just. Basically all you just was, was dehydrating myself to vomiting all the time. It was getting worse and worse. I had a horrific migraine couldn't really see very well or move out from my eyes. Cause the light was harking them a laugh. And I was just really in a terrible, terrible physical state.
[01:10:31] Like I kind of really just lean, not this aspect. And I remember saying to myself to be two things, really, um, you know, nobody else is going to see this. Like nobody else is going to see this and what your, the only one who can see it and experience and feel it. And I don't think anybody and I said this to, I don't think anybody had actually fucking hold that against you, if it should be told.
[01:10:57] And right now, you know what I mean? It's, you know, [01:11:00] it look at you and I say, well, look, it's, we, we staffed it on this, this journey for us and not for other people. So. If we're not going to use these people as a negative thing, why should we use them as a scapegoat for you to stop and. Oh, you said to myself, look, we're just going to finish.
[01:11:22] We're just going to finish. We've got two hours. There was no past, there's no future two hours. We're just going to run in these loops and that's what we're going to do. And we're going to keep moving until we actually can't and that's what we're going to do. And I made that decision as well and my own 55 and the first ever alter that I made was like, we're either going to do 55 miles or a hundred miles of you stacked here.
[01:11:42] No, we're not going to end up doing AIG mites. We're going to finish it to the very, very end. And we're going to just. You know, get it done, get it finished. And, um, you know, when they realize that there is no a spotlight on me, there was no spotlight on me for this patio [01:12:00] run. What that does for my daily life is, you know, there is no nobody watching me when I, you know, pull out the foam roller and do my mobility work and say the sitting room where I decided to do my strength and conditioning program, or I decided to go and do a run.
[01:12:15] There's no one looking at me there. And that's what keeps me accountable to me is knowing that there's nobody there. There's no one looking at me. There's no one pushing me out the door, but it's me. Um, and that's what has kept me on this road, because if all he was doing it all the time for the external validation, not getting fucking much external validation and the fucking , you know what I mean?
[01:12:39] There's nobody that's here with me, really. Like that's keeping me accountable to me and keeping me living the life that I wanted to live. So it would have been gone. It would have been dead in the water because there was no way of getting that external validation. There was very little throughout the whole of the patio run because there was no dinging of the watch for kilometers cause they were fucking taking [01:13:00] ages to do so.
[01:13:01] There was like every book in 45 minutes a kilometer would go by and you're just like, there was no there's no clapping. There's no nothing. It was just.
[01:13:11] Noel: [01:13:11] Strip all the noise away. And it's just you and yourself and all you kind of thing. Yeah,
[01:13:15] Conor: [01:13:15] absolutely not. And look here, it doesn't fucking really matter about the ultramarathons.
[01:13:20] What mattered matters about is like every fucking day. It's the reason why we do things. The reason why we do everything, the reason why we decided to, you know, to look after ourselves, to eat good food, to drink enough water, to get to bed early, it's not for anybody else. It's far loss. And that's what it transfers into his daily life.
[01:13:41] Dan: [01:13:41] Did you ever do any tin kind of. Like, you know, go bowling or anything, or do you just sit, you're not puking into flower pots. Yeah.
[01:13:51] Conor: [01:13:51] Big bump. Yeah. So was my idea of fun has changed and I don't want take that. That's fun. I don't think that that was, that was [01:14:00] definitely not fun. And these things that I, that I, that are involved in the vote here when I'm thinking of these things. Well, like the past you'll run. Oh, you actually, we didn't know what I was getting in for Panasonic.
[01:14:10] Anybody did, because I don't know if it was done before at that level or whatever, but I just had no idea. What was actually going to happen and in that time, so, and
[01:14:21] Noel: [01:14:21] there's no harm in some ways.
[01:14:23] Conor: [01:14:23] Yeah. If I knew it might've been like, it was like sitting down for that flight, every dinner to halfway through my fucking beef Wellington.
[01:14:30] And I was like here book that fucking a hundred million dollars. But if I knew that I was going to feel like I was going to need surgery on my ankle, I probably would have talked twice. Do you know what I mean? So hindsight's great. And I'm not going to sell sometimes my insights at
[01:14:42] Chris: [01:14:42] balls. No, and a nice segue into, um, we've done the hindsight.
[01:14:47] Okay. I feel like you've established, um, uh, psychology for yourself. Um, and a level of introspection that's going to, it's basically set you up for life Connor. And I'd like to look ahead a little bit. This is the last [01:15:00] question of the main segment and we'll move on to some of the fun quickfire questions and a couple of minutes.
[01:15:04] What imagine yourself, um, or imagined do you get to meet yourself at 60? Okay. Or pick an age you don't really mind, but. What do you hope you will, um, tell yourself that you've achieved in your life at that age? You know, you're, you're going on Tarantino soon. So there's 20 or 30 years there. What are you always going to happen in the next 20, 30 years?
[01:15:24] Conor: [01:15:24] And I think, I think I want my legs to expand, you know, I want to have, I want to have kids and things. You know what I mean? I want those things in my life. Like, you know, I want money. Like, I feel like there's a lot in me, you know, it's like, If you, uh, feel like, uh, I mean that place maybe not right? No, but I'm in that place.
[01:15:48] Nowhere where I'm looking down the barrel over the next couple of years and I'm thinking, you know, I probably have it in me to, to. Not just take care of myself, but take care of another person. You know what [01:16:00] I mean? So that's, that's kind of where things are going. And for me, which never would have been on my mind whatsoever drove me twenties, really, um, of like being a dad had this script in my head written for me by me that I wasn't going to be a good dad because I couldn't fucking bear to look after myself.
[01:16:19] And that's a new, um, Oh idea and thought that's in my mind, that is something that I'm really looking forward to seeing what happens with. I love that
[01:16:28] Chris: [01:16:28] answer. I love it because it's the exact same answer as I would get. If our stories are kind of seminar in that we've gone through these kinds of like, you know, I use the word creation or the words creation destruction of these personas, but I've constantly been trying to.
[01:16:45] Find an outlet to express myself as you have, you know, what can I burry my attention to? I'm obsessive person, just like you, you seem to be, you put your mind to something and you're obsessed, but something has happened me in the last few years where, when someone asks me to, to [01:17:00] think about my future, I think about being a dad.
[01:17:02] Conor: [01:17:02] Hmm. Yes. I think that's part of the losing ego as well, Joe. Cause if you, if you, if your ego is very, very potent and powerful at one, a low you to share other aspects of your life with other people, sometimes. And I feel like that can, uh, that has, for me personally, kind of, uh, been, been something that has changed.
[01:17:23] And so it's a load far, the possibility that, you know, I'm caring for the possibility of caring for other people in and over things more so than I cared about, even myself. Um, and that's, that's, that's what I'm I moving less about the ego and about even the self really than, you know, more so just. Almost trying to try and set Nash in a way.
[01:17:46] Um, well, yeah, it's, it's like, uh, you know, I think when people, you know, just saying on this topic of, of like having kids and things like that, um, I feel like [01:18:00] the people in the modern world and the way that we look at the modern world, think about it in the most practical way. Um, I think about all Jesus, you'd want to have a host you and boil your host.
[01:18:10] So you want to have know loads of money and all this kind of stuff. And I'm like, okay, you can have all of those things, but if you're not actually like, and you're probably never ready, obviously until it actually comes both. But if you're not actually mentally in the position to be flexible and to be understanding of other people in other things that are changing and happening in your life, and you don't have the, I suppose maybe the maturity to look at things from other different aspects.
[01:18:36] I think that's the real wealth, you know, when you talking about these things in the real practicalities of it is, you know, how are you actually, regardless of the children, there's very few children like starving in Ireland right now. So you're going to be able to feed it and go with it and do all of those things.
[01:18:54] So when we take away all those things, those worries that we've probably been presented because of the way modern life is [01:19:00] now that we have to have these jobs and the security and this, all this kind of stuff. That, when we strip back all of those things, how are you actually going to be able to deal? And this is the thing that I'm open to and what I really want to discover whether this, Oh, are you going to deal when shit's just not going right?
[01:19:14] And the idealisms that you've built in your head about having children are not coming to fruition and you're in and out of doctor's offices or you're barely fucking sleeping. And all of these things are happening now. How are you going to deal with that? No money is going to fucking start that outfit.
[01:19:32] Noel: [01:19:32] w w w having three kids and just as a heads up, your, your, your, uh, your podcast is called flip the script. You might want to change that to just tear up the script, cause it know exactly when the kids are there, but it's a great journey for both of you, particularly Connor, obviously we're talking, focusing on in today is the journey to get to that stage where you kind of look at it.
[01:19:54] This is something that I said to me, um, And, uh, [01:20:00] you know, and it is, it's important for each of us to realize, look, we are important, but sometimes, you know, us, we're not that important. We get notions of ourselves and that's, you know, the ego is right in our face. And, and it's, it's trying to remember that.
[01:20:12] And it's an, it's a humbling thing. That's why, you know, servitude the stuff that you've done for PSA house. And, and, and you'd see that in general, it's a lot of sports teams, I think in particular, have the focus on it now with talking about, you know, Give give, give to other people, give to someone else, um, because it just it's, uh, you know, that, that, that humidity that is so important, what it does is it strips away of all the noise, all the, all the crap around us, um, and puts us very simply.
[01:20:39] Um, just ourselves and it exposes yourselves. Like you've done in the way in which you've exposed yourself to a fully expose yourself and just, and therefore you've had to accept yourself and it's not just accept yourself for who you are, but accept yourself for who you are. Not like you said there, that I'm not this perfect quote, unquote dad or parent or whatever it is.
[01:20:57] And it's, it's, it's, it's an amazing thing to [01:21:00] get to that, that you're in that place in your life. Again, like you said, as you're 40, where there's loads to go because we're human. There's lots more stuff in that script that we know really. Yeah. Yeah.
[01:21:12] Conor: [01:21:12] You know? No, definitely. No, like I think you're, you're, you're bang on there because I feel like.
[01:21:18] Um, I feel like in life, sometimes you just actually, after fucking jail, you have into something to actually figure out what it's all in the boat, you know, because, and like, even for me, I had a noter script written in my head of that. I'm not a relationships, but here I am living on an act on accolade though.
[01:21:35] You know what I mean? Like y'all, as, as secluded as we can possibly fucking be together, you know, and yeah. Like really feeding into that. And I didn't realize it until the relationship came about was all of the, you know, the insecurities, the, the parts of me that maybe I didn't really look at, or I was, I was comfortable with, you know, on my own, but no, no, that there's something else that's [01:22:00] important to me.
[01:22:00] And that I'm I'm on that. I really care about. That, with that importance and caring for somebody that fear comes in. And that fear is generally like in, in my own estimation is usually fueled by an insecurity coming from myself and projecting it onto the world or somebody else. And I don't think they've actually been able to act, you know, to uncover those insecurities and to uncover those aspects of myself and realize that what shifts actually, Joanne, you're not as sure of yourself as you, as you thought you were.
[01:22:31] That's okay. That's fine. This is what we're here for. We're here to, you know what I mean, to try and actually figure these things out. And, uh, through that has actually made me yet, you know, sit into another level of cam and another level of contentment for myself was actually realizing, okay, put my hands up and actually saying, first of all, I'm an insecure guy.
[01:22:52] Which is like a big thing for, you know, for, for generally men, anything to re to, to put their hands up and [01:23:00] say, yeah, I'm fucking insecure. I'm insecure about this. And I am confident about Lords of elements of my life, but this particular thing, you know, I'm not too confident with. I'm not too trusting of.
[01:23:12] And, and the, and these insecurities now just like the foyer. It can fuck and actually give you the fuel to move yourself forward in the relationship, or it can burn at all. And it can just fucking destroy everything around you. And you know, for me, what I've realized is, Oh, you made that choice. Know I made that choice for myself and I make that choice, whether this fire that is inside me of these thoughts and all these kinds of salts is going to burn me off, or it's going to give me the fuel to actually really look inside and, you know, Well, it can be vulnerable as well.
[01:23:42] And like some of the silliest things that can go through a person's head sharing them with the person that you're with. It's like, you know, this is actually a way I'm feeling and thinking right now. And I don't know, it may not even make sense, but, uh, I'm going to say it anyway of risking sounding really stupid or really weak [01:24:00] and.
[01:24:00] Right. No. And to you just because, Oh, you don't want it burning meal. I wanted to be able to be open and see how we both can fucking figure this thing out. And I'm opening the door for you as well, by doing that, you know, and that's the thing I'm opening the door for the other person. And if the other person wants to come in and say, I hear John, I'm actually not fucking feeling great about this, that the other.
[01:24:20] And I was actually having to thoughts about this the other day and, you know, The, the thing about is, uh, realized is that no, it's just like a, no, question's a stupid question. I say that all the time when I give talks to companies, like no thought is a stupid thought, cause it's a re it's it's, it can, it can become very real to you, even though the thoughts are not real, they can become very, very real and enter your real life as you're not actually there to catch it and say, this is it.
[01:24:45] So knowing that North art and no fucking feeling is stupid on their site or your site. And I feel like. When children come about, there's going to be another level of that too, where I realize that I'm not going to be fucking [01:25:00] perfect and on the ball and I fuck it. I might lose my temper and, you know, and then feel bad about it.
[01:25:04] And then, you know, there might be other aspects and I'm open to that. And I suppose knowing that is, is, is, is getting there to the point where it's like general, um, Maybe I do have a lot more work to do, but it's it's okay. Because just being accountable to yourself is knowing that little pocket there's going to be work to do we better do it like.
[01:25:25] Chris: [01:25:25] Connor, we could talk for five hours. Um, but I don't want to hit the dreaded 90 minute Mark where people who've stopped dropping off. Um, okay. So this concludes the main segment where we've come up with this idea of doing a bit of a quick fire round at the end, doing this in the floor. You know, I'm gonna make up the rules as I go.
[01:25:40] I'm gonna ask you, I have, I have 12 questions in front of me. Um, those are this. Yeah, you've got to just answer them. In like five seconds or less. Okay. Quick fire questions. Okay. We don't have a name for this. We're insert name here eventually, but we're calling a quick fire now. Okay. Okay. So question one, [01:26:00] what does 1916 mean to you?
[01:26:06] Conor: [01:26:06] Um, the beginning.
[01:26:09] Chris: [01:26:09] Okay. What, who is Ronak?
[01:26:13] Conor: [01:26:13] He's a bollocks. He has no place in my life.
[01:26:17] Chris: [01:26:17] Your mantra is TFS what's. The Fs
[01:26:21] Conor: [01:26:21] DFS is tough fucker. Shit. I came up with this on the fly about two years ago.
[01:26:28] Chris: [01:26:28] What separates you from David Goggins
[01:26:31] Conor: [01:26:31] at hair? Lots of hair.
[01:26:35] Chris: [01:26:35] Okay. What would it feel like to give up in a race?
[01:26:38] Conor: [01:26:38] Um, I don't know. And I hope to never know. Nice
[01:26:42] Chris: [01:26:42] answer. Finish this sentence. Cash rules, everything around me. Nice. Your favorite hip hop album of all
[01:26:50] Conor: [01:26:50] time. Illmatic, finance, nice
[01:26:54] Chris: [01:26:54] name something you could not live without.
[01:26:57] Conor: [01:26:57] Am I going to say it? [01:27:00] Nice. Well
[01:27:01] Chris: [01:27:01] done. No, you're out. If you were the last person on earth, what would you still do?
[01:27:08] Conor: [01:27:08] Ron?
[01:27:11] Chris: [01:27:11] If you could broadcast a message to everyone on earth, what would it be?
[01:27:16] Conor: [01:27:16] Look after yourself. Think good thoughts about yourself. Pretty
[01:27:21] Chris: [01:27:21] good. What advice should young people ignore
[01:27:25] Conor: [01:27:25] and that you always have to be pushing to reach to the highest of the Heights. You don't. It's very, very okay. To just have days where you just live,
[01:27:37] Chris: [01:27:37] finish the sentence at the end of the day, it all comes down to
[01:27:44] that. No, this has been an episode with Connor O'Keefe of the one DMC podcast. And we're going to leave it there, guys. Thank you very much for listening next week. Thanks
[01:27:53] Dan: [01:27:53] Connor. Before we let you go, where can we, where can folks find
[01:27:56] Conor: [01:27:56] you? Yes. Um, you follow me on Instagram at [01:28:00] key for Kochi, for whatever way people want to say it.
[01:28:03] Um, it's C O K E F F E M. I'm already linked to my Patreon and my Spotify are there as well for, for flip the script.
[01:28:15] Dan: [01:28:15] Unbelievable. Thanks so much. All right guys. Thanks, Connor.
