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Transcripts may (read: definitely will) contain typos. We use software to transcribe the show and American artificial intelligence is apparently not intelligent enough to understand the Irish accent; go figure!
In time, if people read these, we'll have them fully proof read by human intelligence and corrected for grammar and syntax.
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Chris: [00:00:00]
[00:00:00] [00:00:00] The Glavin welcome to the show. And I want to say first and foremost, we're grateful that you gave us your time with April coming on. And I got to say, man, you're a breath of fresh air. Um, I hadn't come across before that. Dan had sent me your stuff, boss. I think just, uh, you know, 10 seconds on your timeline, uh, on Instagram will tell people a lot about, you know, there's a lot of dogs, there's a lot of fitness.
[00:00:24] There's not a balancing and there's a lot of the outdoors. So I want to kind of get into your story today and I want to maybe go back, um, into your past a little bit and we'll come, come to your present day, what you're doing, and hopefully talk a little bit about your future. Um, so just to start off, I think you grew up in, if I'm wrong in any of this for I'm in factual, you can correct me, but I think you grew up in, in Talla, um, at the base of the fr club and which is probably the Providence of your.
[00:00:53] Interest in the outdoors, et cetera. So can you maybe tell us a little bit about growing up there and, and, and, uh, how your, your [00:01:00] character developed from your childhood?
[00:01:02] Anto: [00:01:02] Absolutely. So great. Help me on, thank you very much. I appreciate this. Um, so I had a really normal childhood, right? Um, it was always huge emphasis on the outdoors, huge emphasis on sport from my granddad and dad at music as well.
[00:01:21] But. Um, competitive store sport was my thing, for sure. Like that was, that was where I was pushed. That's what I did from a very young age, like her and football and athletics basketball. And I kind of played like Piyush and everything for the whole first part of my life. Eh, it was gray cracked to the point where even when it went to secondary school, right.
[00:01:44] So I'm not academics at all. Like not academic at all. In fact, like. Not, not just me, but professionals would consider me dyslexic and definitely have ADHD for sure. And [00:02:00] in first year I got the student of the year award. Right. Which was more like more like, I don't understand why I'm getting this book.
[00:02:07] Great. I'm the teachers who were like more academic teachers were so like kind of like. Angry and put out boy that a couple of them took me aside after class and were like, you're getting this award, but it's not because of what you've learned or how you doing in
[00:02:19] Dan: [00:02:19] class. It's because of sport. And I was like, okay, cool.
[00:02:22] So, so it was like,
[00:02:24] Anto: [00:02:24] it was, it was an unusual, usual stack, like skills. I had a normal childhood, like, you know, you know, going out having a crack, playing football, chaise, and girls fighting like all the usual, like boring bullshit that everyone has grown up. Usually. Well, the mountains were huge. Part of that, the mountains were a huge part of that.
[00:02:43] As I said, I come from the base of a hellfire club and in it's tolerable,
[00:02:47] Dan: [00:02:47] it's like, it's like, they kind of like suburban
[00:02:50] Anto: [00:02:50] soft talent. And in fact, I'm sure estate agents will call it like building 16 now. So they want to sell the houses there. [00:03:00] It was always this allure of the mountains. And so on first year, It's playing lots of sports, having the crock, really enjoying sport outside of school and inside school.
[00:03:12] Then in second year I was having the same thing, but then one of the kind of like, um, let's call it like big perspective givers. I'm not sure if not to go away. At point in that book, there was a lot of death in my school. There was a, like a, an extreme meant that like for, for, for the ages, Um, for the classes, there was a lot of depth and less skills.
[00:03:36] So one of my friends died when I was in second year. And when someone dies so young, it's really hard to contextualize that in, um, in your head, you know, you're not really settled for, for that kind of thing at all. You don't know why it happens, you know, where they go, you know, you haven't been thinking about that.
[00:03:58] You've been thinking about. [00:04:00] Football. You've been thinking about whatever the fuck your homework. And then all of a sudden you're like, Oh, now someone's gone. And there was a couple of stabbings as well, couple of cancers. And then, and then my friend unfortunately died. And, um, it was just, it was just mad.
[00:04:14] It was just like this, this might context given about life at a very early age. And that's where the outdoors for me became really, really important. So on my way to school, Every day, I could see the skill from a Headspace. Um, just cause I kind of lived on a Hill. It was downhill. It's about 20 minute walk and going to school every day.
[00:04:40] If you look left, it was just the mountains. The mountains are just there. So it was really hard when given the kind of futility of life, when, when shown like that, like nothing really matters. Cause you just die anyway. Do you know what I mean? That's how it felt at the time. Obviously. Like, I feel kind of, but like you just start anyway.
[00:04:59] Why don't you just go [00:05:00] fucking hike and do you know what I mean? I had lots of friends who came with me, like, and we'd just go up the mountains. We'd set up, set up camps. We'd we'd, we'd make far weeds. We'd um, obviously we're fourteens weekends, a lot of like a loader show where we get loads of gas, canisters and blow them up and stuff,
[00:05:13] Dan: [00:05:13] but like
[00:05:14] Anto: [00:05:14] that's different.
[00:05:15] Um, Um, but basically we we'd, um, we'd uh, yeah, just go up and just, just do a rudimentary bushcraft and hiking, and it was a great way and explore, and that was just a great way of like getting life back into after, after that, for sure. Um, but that, that was, that was, um, the main point where I realized that, what am I trying to say, basically, that.
[00:05:41] Sport was really helpful for me to and train and was really helpful and unencumbered kind of hiking and unexplored in that because, um, the kind of adversity of sports, the manufacturer, varsity sports, the diversity of hiking, getting open mountain, get over mountains and [00:06:00] spending a full day in the woods was really beneficial at that stage.
[00:06:03] So it's where I'm with deep love of the mountains kind of came from
[00:06:08] Chris: [00:06:08] like, I don't want to, um, Rush over this point, but I don't want to belabor it either. Um, I think that's a very poignant story. You know, you talk about the manufactured adversity that a physical fitness can give you in sport can give you et cetera, but there's nothing manufactured about, um, losing friends at a young age.
[00:06:27] And I think, you know, I can only relate to this in one way. And it's, I, I, I told the story in the last episode that. I lived with my aunt or she lived with us when I was 14, 15, and she passed away from cancer. And it was a time in my life where you're, you're, I'm cognizant enough of mortality that, you know, what's happening.
[00:06:48] You know, someone is kind of leaving this earth and, um, you know, you want me to have spirituality or religion to explain that to you or you don't. Um, and I think that for me, certainly [00:07:00] it gave me, um, Perspective on the shortness of life. And I think that translates into, you know, the way I look at the world and the things I try and seek out and learning I tried to do.
[00:07:14] But do you think that it perhaps gave you a perspective on the shortness of life? I can see it. It seems to have reverberated. You can correct me if I'm wrong here into how you live your life, because you seem to be. A very joyful person. You seem to kind of take each day as it comes and you seem to, uh, you know, consume the world in a way that's really, really refreshing.
[00:07:36] But did, did it give you, did that give you that perspective on life?
[00:07:40] Anto: [00:07:40] It did so. Yeah. Okay. Maybe, maybe I can, it started that like, um, the idea that love is very short. It started, it started that in my brain for sure. Um, I started to know that like, Hey, listen, you can't take things too seriously. Um, One of my things that I'm always trying to tell myself, I kind of a [00:08:00] little mantra for myself is like, keep the child alive to keep the child alive.
[00:08:03] And I don't mean that about my son. Like death will keep him alone, but, uh, yeah, just, just, you know, play time having a laugh. That's what my kind of balancing playing around on bars. Wellness rewards. That's what that's all about. It's all about keeping the child alive because, because when you don't and when you kind of get bogged down and you do no favors for anyone, especially yourself, pull it.
[00:08:27] I had, I had, um, how can I put this? I two kind of major awakenings in my life. That was definitely one. That was, that was a huge milestone. Where all of a sudden you realize you're not invincible. That's a huge thing too. To wake up as a child. You're not invincible. Cause like death is so abstract, like it's abstract anyway, these days, do you know, especially during COVID like, um, it's kind of a sanitized process.
[00:08:57] Like back in the day, doors [00:09:00] used to be wider. So people can get caskets out of them, meaning that people died at home. People had open casket, wakes people that was a part of life like, and nowadays, or in the generation I grew up, that's very sanitized. It happens in hospitals, happens away from people. Um, so when something hits that hard and that kind of close to you, um, it definitely, it's always gonna affect you.
[00:09:23] Number one, it's definitely always gonna affect you with the perspective it gives us is, um, is. Uh, how can I say it's like timeless, you don't know at the time, you don't know, but it's going to stick with you. It's going to change your perspective. So definitely like, like what I would be into like, bring back to the sport, but like sport was, was a big way of me kind of like contextualize in that and also like kind of living your life.
[00:09:45] Like when you are doing a sport where you're balancing on a beam, whether you're thrown something, whether you're doing CrossFit, jujitsu, MMA, whatever you're doing, you are in that moment at that time. So. It's very kind of a, [00:10:00] you know, you're here now. You're, you're being, you're being the here and now you're being, you know, presence basically.
[00:10:06] I believe people put it. So, you know, that was a great game for me for doing that. The second kind of, can I put it, I'll start with competitiveness. Um, I was a hyper, hyper competitive do. Like hyper competitive, like whether it was jujitsu hurling football box. And like I wanted to. Number one, win number two through people in like, that's all I want, wanted to do.
[00:10:38] And yeah, just like just win at all costs. That was my, that was my mentality. Right. And maybe through the depth of sport, um, I didn't see anything wrong with that because obviously you have coaches, right? I've had like, like sales and coaches and then they see you win and they see you getting down and dirty.
[00:10:54] Like they love that. That's that's, you know, that's definitely encouraged in that world [00:11:00] then. I continued playing everything I was doing well, it was getting big into jujitsu. I was finally hitting tournaments. I was doing well in tournaments at the tournament before I had my accident. I'll get to maths and nail, but I came like a podium that podiums a good way, by the way of that.
[00:11:20] Saying like a third. Do you know what
[00:11:21] Dan: [00:11:21] I mean? If you've got second, you say you got second. If you go first, like, Oh, well not like, if you say a podium, like it's always started. It's never anything else be like, shut
[00:11:29] Anto: [00:11:29] up and say to her anyway. Yeah. So that was more like, obviously there's loads of, he does put in a
[00:11:35] Dan: [00:11:35] simplified reductive way.
[00:11:36] That was more life. I was just
[00:11:37] Anto: [00:11:37] hyper competitive. The Eagle only had a bet winning was unsurpassed by anything
[00:11:43] Dan: [00:11:43] else. My ego was like taller than I was like. I was huge.
[00:11:47] Anto: [00:11:47] Anyway, as a job, I was Scheffing at the time. And one night I got really badly burns, like really body burns at around 11 o'clock and a full [00:12:00] Burgo boiler fell on me.
[00:12:03] Like, like really bad third degree burns from way. Uh, I'll send you guys a photo off it as easily, so you can, uh, you can have a, look
[00:12:11] Dan: [00:12:11] it up, please, please,
[00:12:12] Anto: [00:12:12] please. Don't
[00:12:16] throw it in the blanks on that little secret folder you have come here. So from my head to my arms was just. Correct. And happened one call night in December in December. I can't remember what age was like 1920 or something. And then, um, it was, it was pretty traumatic. Like I have to like, basically like jump in a taxi from the city center to James the street.
[00:12:47] Um, like just with my shorts on, like I had to get rid of everything else. I run, I run into the hospital was like, ah, and they could see, it was like an emergency center. Just brought me straight in and I was just [00:13:00] given those a still for it. And it was getting pretty bad. I don't always Jude to have a skin graft.
[00:13:05] It was,
[00:13:05] Dan: [00:13:05] it was, it was rough. I will show you the photos. I know. I know, but I'll show you
[00:13:09] Anto: [00:13:09] photos. Anyway, when I was in there, I was always very consumed with pain. The physical feeling of being that body burns in that big, big, um, biggest space was just horrible. Like, you can feel your skin moving over your skin.
[00:13:27] You can feel your skin like filling up with water and then popping in, Oh man, it was so rough, but something happened when I was in the hospital. Right. I was in, and all the sudden they started clearing a and E, which is always a bad sign. I didn't know. It was a bad sign. At the time they were just throwing wet Hills over me, jails, all that kind of stuff to try, make the pain less and all they can do for a burn that bot is basically just like they can give you morphine and they can just keep trying to cool the burns [00:14:00] down.
[00:14:00] So I was doing a lot to try to keep warm because. They were pouring so much cold water and cold hails on me that I was, I was shivering. I was like, I've had hot hypothermia a couple of times in my life and I could definitely feel like something like that was anyway. Oh yeah. I was, I was just in bed, running around.
[00:14:23] I was just all in my head, pain, pain, pain, cold trying to run. It was, it was, it was a traumatic time. And then also this gurney came in with a lot on it. Who'd had a heart attack. And as I said, they cleared and he came in with a heart attack dead. And when you're dead, evidently they're going to use the defibrillator on you at a pretty high setting to the point where there was like smoke and smell.
[00:14:57] And, um, it was horrible. And then his [00:15:00] family came in is, is, is, is either daughter or wife. Um, and was like on them, shaking him saying like no screaming. No. And mine, it was like, it was so rough. It was, it was, it was just pure trauma, pure negative from, in, in, in that place. I was still running around with Ben.
[00:15:19] Didn't know what to do, but in a way I was like, Oh my God, I could be so much worse. I could be so much worse. Um, So that, that would, that was like my burn experience. It was like, Oh shit. Like, like after that Northern really seemed the same. And I was eight months in, in gauze, basically. Like, you know, like a diving Ofer I'd ran my head.
[00:15:41] I couldn't really do anything except sit in front of a computer. And I was always all, like, all I could do is yeah, just like watch movies, YouTube. Um, I think it was like 2011 or 12. So like there wasn't, you know, it wasn't like the internet wasn't like it was today, but it was still, still, still fucking do [00:16:00] what?
[00:16:00] Um, uh, I was, I was eight months just sitting there doing nothing. And especially after like, I was doing, I was doing trail on races, BJJ tournaments, like all these kinds of things. And then just to sit there doing nothing now I was really fit. So it was, it was, it was working out for me, well, had to concentrate and healing.
[00:16:22] That's all I could do. Concentrate and healing. So I did my research and I was a raw vegan at the time as well, which, which was, uh, which was like, um, it's it's I don't know what to say. Like. It's a controversial diet, for sure. So it was like, like let's call it a 90% raw vegan. Um, and when I was looking at healing, college was a huge thing and that doesn't really occur too much in, in, in, in raw vegan.
[00:16:54] Unfortunately it's, it's like bone broth. It's, you know, it's fish, it's it's chicken. So I [00:17:00] decided to go to my health. I was going to do all that. I'm taking huge amounts of like exogenous. Apologies as well. And looking off, I missed the skin graph. I didn't have to have my skin graph, which was, which was actually amazing because the idea of them just like whipping a load of flash off your arse and just throwing out to your back was like not the most appealing thing in the world.
[00:17:22] Obviously see
[00:17:22] Dan: [00:17:22] Chris looking a little bit squeamish.
[00:17:25] Chris: [00:17:25] Yeah. I'm very squeamish. I'm very, very squeamish, but this is, this is like, um, now requested by, um, the story, you know, like. I don't know if you can, it can tell the, the power of that story, but you know, some of the descriptions there about the person coming in who is obviously ceased and the smell and the approaches of recovery and the healing and, and, you know, looking at your process of healing and, you know, an eight month period of time is, you know, time is, um, Time subjective, you know, and eight months can feel like a very fucking long [00:18:00] time if you're burned and waiting for yourself, but it tells me a lot about you.
[00:18:06] Um, and it explains a lot about you, you know, I had felt that perhaps your sense of resilience was you do a lot of physical feats that I know to get there. You have to be very resilient, uh, you know, to be able to do certain things that I've seen you do, even, you know, backflip and, uh, you know, your back, flipping off things and, and, um, That, that takes overcoming a fear.
[00:18:26] And all of these things take a very long time, and I felt that you were doing that to build resilience, but it seems to me now that this, um, profound moment in your life, and I don't want to overstate it, but like, that's going to change anyone, you know, and that's going to give anyone a sense of resilience and any sense of perspective.
[00:18:43] You are almost at that store and you're watching someone die. You know, that's not going to leave you, um, too quickly, you know, I'd like Nieto has this idea that. For, in order to create anything, there has to be a, uh, a sense of destruction. And you talked about Eagle earlier. Um, [00:19:00] this is like a favorite topic of mine is Eagle depletion and the idea of identity and ego and how we can manifest that in many ways.
[00:19:07] Um, but you feel like that moment, um, carried forward into the training that you do and your approach to life. Um, how do you apply that sense of resilience and that sense of perspective to everything you do now?
[00:19:24] Dan: [00:19:24] What it did was
[00:19:27] Anto: [00:19:27] it's now the disillusionment of, uh, or disillusion of, of, of ego. Like, eh, you know, obviously like everyone is equal no matter what. And I was sad about my body. The look of my body. Like, you know, as, as men, obviously we're, you know, we're caught in a scar. Like, it doesn't matter. Like it's cool, but like I huge amounts of scarring.
[00:19:51] Um, I think you're sad about like, Oh shit. Like, you know, I look kind of like, eh, you know, even if you don't want to admit it, like it's kind of those body a little [00:20:00] bit. Um, I got a little bit overweight cause I was just sitting around eating. I couldn't do anything. So like the ego was hurt that way.
[00:20:08] Competitive side. Of my ego was doing something interesting at that time, because there was no way I was going to get back into jujitsu. Anytime soon, there was no way I was going to play field sports anytime. Um, so I had to change my perspective. So all I could do, and this is like, this is like a year basically after it was build up my running.
[00:20:34] Um, So I decided I was like, okay, listen, like all over on the mountains. Anyway, why don't I just focus my attention on mountain running as a way of getting back to fitness. And that's what it was. It was, it was a, it was a tool to get back to fitness because every time I went to BJJ, I'm going to do a coconut classes.
[00:20:55] I was in this like ropey, gym and chroma at the time. Um, and every [00:21:00] time I went to a class, anytime we got put on my back, I basically, it was like wearing a wetsuit, like on my back, like my, my, my scars were moving over my skin and you could feel it, it was like wearing it like a rush guy, but there's no rush guy there, you know?
[00:21:17] So it was like fucked out, like Hans do at the moment. Right. I can't use it. So it was running, running, running, running. So I got into running, running barefoot, running huge amounts. And then I kind of got into like the meditative state of running, like not just running for the sake of, you know, cause I was like even the crossword mentality now, like I, I kind of had that back then, whereas like run for time.
[00:21:44] Do this time yourself, beat your last rep, you know, like Dakota, I thought that kind of attitudes of running, which I get, you know, that's great if you want to get refit cool. And the gang, but I started getting into the myth, meditative state of running. Um, I started getting into like [00:22:00] binaural beats. Water running training, trying to get into that kind of like basically like the Zen state running, just like running on, just like forgetting about things, letting your mind go.
[00:22:11] And then corporate things happened. I got fucking tiny. I got time. Oh yeah. I went down to like, was like 71 key, like on 85. Where I sit now, like lean ish, 85. And I got the answer by 71 kilos. I'd say I was just like a weapon, like obviously whip it. Like the breeze is blowing me away in the mountains. I got into the idea of just for like a very year of using, um, edibles, um, like edible weed and long distance.
[00:22:50] Rolling. Uh, which is an unusual little combo, but it was really good for me at the time. Like I would just eat, add friend of mine may be [00:23:00] brownies. I just eat them and then go do ultra distance runs and. Well, I listen to binaural beats and man, it was just like, it was transcended, like just be balls. And like, after it was amazing, it just like filled me with such joy.
[00:23:16] And it was a, I used to call it astral traveling. I know that has of things, but I was like, I'm going Astro traveling. And it felt like that it was amazing. And it was bringing me so much joy. And through that, like, I didn't do it like maybe for, let's say eight months a year. I did a bit of that and it was amazing transcendent, like just like.
[00:23:35] It just made me happy. I used to go from like, like one stage, like I went from like my house and Tala and like was running to Glen, the lock Clara and over to Wicklow way. And it was amazing. It was amazing.
[00:23:49] Dan: [00:23:49] I I'd say I, the lads would probably want to ask you a little bit more about the kind of mind state there, but, but one thing, just because I'm I'm, I don't know.
[00:23:58] I kind of look for the comedy [00:24:00] sometimes things, but edibles and. Things don't typically mix well, you know, from my experience and, you know, have you ever, ever got something real wrong there? Like I know that I've heard these stories of people, uh, people, you know, eating edibles and then three hours later thinking nothing's happened and then five hours later just being, you know, insanely mangled.
[00:24:20] So have you ever had a tech, have you ever had a terrible experience, astral traveling
[00:24:26] Anto: [00:24:26] in terms of edibles? No. So, so, so, so back, um, the only bad thing that happened to me right. Is, and it wasn't even bought it wasn't even about is that I got to, I was doing like, I'd say maybe 30 K Ronisha. I also used to never put parameters on the rules.
[00:24:46] I was like, I'll just keep on going as long as it's gone. But I got to where Joe Smith and I was doing kind of the week away and I got to the side of jokes and there was a herd of deer. And I just sat there across lagging, watch them. And when I looked down, I'd been watching them [00:25:00] for like two and a half hours and it was getting
[00:25:01] Dan: [00:25:01] dark, like under three hours to get bikes.
[00:25:04] Anto: [00:25:04] And that was the worst that happens, I think when you're kind of using it all, getting it through your system, you, and maybe you won't, you're not going to have that bad experience, but anyway, I don't condone views. I'm not like was going to do this, but it's just something I used at the time, um, that I found really, really, um, Enabled, um, meet have enthusiasm about physical activity.
[00:25:28] Cause I was just down for eight months and not really doing much. And the nice thing was it got me back into UGA too. The whole thing got me back into jujitsu. So I kept ultimate Rhona and didn't do that hospital problem much after that. Cause I had to like go back to real life and all that. Um, but I am, I went back to a bit of jujitsu and.
[00:25:54] What happened was there was a crop McGahn studio in and they offered me a job [00:26:00] teaching jujitsu to crop myGov people and not something that totally interests me. definitely not something that interests me at all. Like Fairplay to anyone getting out and doing anything physical. There's a lot of snobbery in MMA and jujitsu about other, um, martial arts, for sure.
[00:26:19] Um, You can say, Oh, that's crap. That doesn't work. That doesn't work. And like, you can say that, but loads, the fucking things, like you can say MMA doesn't work. Cause you can just shoot someone like, um, yeah, anyway, I'm diverting, but, um, eh, it just didn't interest me crap. We got didn't interest me and I liked the sports U2 and I was offered to like start a lit jujitsu school there.
[00:26:44] So me as a kind of like a good ish blue belt. And, and it's like, people can do it, even though I felt weird on me league, but it was a beginner beginner class. And I felt like it was a good coach. I used to coach her a little football. I was like, okay, I can get Don cross. And. [00:27:00] My problem was, I was like used to compete.
[00:27:02] And so I was like, fuck, okay. I've got to, I'm probably going to have to get back to a tournament or two at some stage I was all healed up. Generally, obviously like the scars were all there. Like it was still, it's always going to bother me, but like, um, I was like, fuck, I better get back to a tournament to do so a year later after training with all these lives and praying and a couple of absolute legends, as well as Mario did the final, um, got into, um, like, like obviously legends he's in SPG now as well.
[00:27:34] Um, and he's fucking soon as well. What, like a couple of legends I coached, I was really happy doing that. Well, my problem was, I still didn't like, I hadn't gained that competitive nature back, which I thought would come back. I thought, well, you go, we'll go. Okay. You've done your like huge mountain running these gains.
[00:27:54] You know, something out of that. Now let's get back to the grind. But it wasn't the same [00:28:00] Northern was the same in good ways and bad ways. GJ too, as a competitive sports, I wasn't that competitive anymore. I just didn't have the competitive attitudes, egos, phony. I still wanted to win, but I had no emphasis because I know emphasis on winning as well.
[00:28:19] I felt no pressure. I didn't have any pressure whatsoever because I was like, fuck it. I don't care. Competition is great fun, but I don't need to win. That is how it felt, but I was still going,
[00:28:29] Dan: [00:28:29] okay, I should go, I should do these things. I should do things.
[00:28:32] Anto: [00:28:32] Cause it just cause a conditioning of years. Anyway, after like a year of training of training, people get my skill back together and train you're at East coast jujitsu with the amazing Chris Lettie.
[00:28:42] And I started to do an alternate, a submission wrestling term. Man, I couldn't have, I couldn't like if I was staying to, you know, make a kind of a game plan, that was the shittiest game plan in the world. It [00:29:00] would have been this, but I just wasn't thinking about it. And it's in reading. So I went into tournaments, uh, made weight and weight was 73 kilos, I think.
[00:29:08] So it was a tough way. Corporate. I was like, forget it. You know, that'll be fun after all the running. I did. I found a kind of like did like a kind of found body changes. Very interesting. So when the way court was offered, I could go on at 77 or 73. I was like, if we're going to go 73 and have a little journey, do you know what I mean, have a little journey and say weight loss and to get up by anyway, I just found it all very interesting.
[00:29:29] Still lots to do what you do still do. Um, you know, I love the idea of horses for courses on that. You can change your body, um, to suit different sports book. Anyway, Winton is that after I weighed in. I decided I was gonna like go to a nice, fancy little Dahlia and get with like these lovely biscuits would like a onion, marmalade and cheese, and like all these little like and just throw it away.
[00:29:55] So I was sitting beside the mat, watching the tournament, eating this drink and like [00:30:00] espressos cappuccinos, and just been like, Oh, this is great. Like, because the whole thing for me, it was like, Oh, I made that way. That was interesting. Wasn't it? That was my journey. Anyway. Bell rings I'm across the map.
[00:30:13] Noel: [00:30:13] No, sorry.
[00:30:13] Uh, just, it's just really interesting. This is something that we've talked about before and it will always come up. It starts your, your thing called your low, uh, your locus, either local evaluation or locus of control, but it's, it's just really interesting to see where your value was coming from. You know, and that can often happen, especially at a young age when you've got those influences, especially your dad and your granddad and those competitive sports is the gourd.
[00:30:38] If I win this thing and having those events, like the den, that's such a young age, really in your face, like you said, it's very hard to kind of fully comprehend, but then as you're, as you're 1920, and that accident happens to you, I'm really interested in that. Like you're going through. An unbelievable amount of pain yet.
[00:30:59] That's [00:31:00] that what's going on around you. And of course it will affect you, but it re it sounds like it really you're a very you're you're you, you really saw it far more than it was just, Oh, someone's just beside me. And they're going to all these machines, you saw the person, the spirit, the life force there.
[00:31:15] And it's just interesting. And I'm wondering again, this isn't necessarily the question to be answered straight away, something to think about for yourself and lots of different people of, of. Changing that I don't need to get my value from winning those competitions anymore. It was a purposeful change in your head or just those actions, those events that happened to you and being around those events, it shifted you it's shifted just to say, uh, you know, I, I, I'll still wanting to get stuff done, you know, see the progress through the weight and things like that.
[00:31:46] Um, you know, th there's an involvement there. I still keep my standards for things, but if, if I don't win that's okay. Like I I'm enjoying, like you said, there, I'm enjoying the process. I'm sitting, I'm sitting by the motto, my [00:32:00] charcuterie and, and it's. Yeah. I think it's just a fantastic thing to see. Was it something that you get, do you think you consciously and again, it's, it's very hard to think at the time and versus now, because I suppose you you've seen a lot of stuff happen, but was there a conscious.
[00:32:15] Thing of ongoing to change where I get my value farm from, or is it something I suppose, looking back that just, it just organically played out that way.
[00:32:26] Anto: [00:32:26] That's cool question. I, at that stage in my life, I was very much, um, more competitive nature was on the downturn. Like I still have a competitive major, but it's more so the local competition, as opposed to the love of winning, um, Maybe actually, Joel, I'll tell you how that tournament went for me.
[00:32:44] Um, cause that, that was my, that was like my complete ego death for awhile. Uh, yeah, that was, that was real. So, so the bell rings anyway, we lock into it and I am a, well, when I did it, full-time almost like [00:33:00] a top game dude. I was like wrestler top game at dominance. You know, it doesn't, that's my competitive nature.
[00:33:05] Like as opposed to like, you know, on my back. So. Cause I like hadn't put any emphasis, what awful can I ever
[00:33:12] Dan: [00:33:12] into winning this
[00:33:14] Anto: [00:33:14] tournament? I just trained for it and was just happy to be there. And I really wanted to have my guys do well. That was my main, main focus is like a womp the people that I coach to do web.
[00:33:24] And it was just like also, I don't for two, anyway, bell rings. I go in, and for some reason I pull half guard straightaway, which means. You just jump
[00:33:34] Dan: [00:33:34] underneath. So
[00:33:35] Anto: [00:33:35] someone's directly on top of it, which is not my game whatsoever. I was just like, I'll just be on my bike. Like, I don't know why. Anyway, well, he sets in a joke on me.
[00:33:48] And I'm just enjoying the process. I'm like, not even like I'm defending it a little bit. I'm like, Oh, this is grind. I've gotten a dark joke. If you're in Virginia, I was going to Dallas, which is like, just kind of like, you know, you know, [00:34:00] it's a blue chill basically. And the thing about blood jokes is when they work on you, you have no time to think about it.
[00:34:07] So all this grind. A hundred percent grind. I was just thinking, I was like, I'm just gonna let him tire. It was arms to be grind. I was like a tough neck. I was just like tense or whatever. Like I was being stupid and like deeply competitive, which is bod when you're getting shot. And I went out and I was just like brought through a tunnel of light.
[00:34:29] And when I woke up the rest. And, uh,
[00:34:32] Dan: [00:34:32] the competitor on the tournament organizer were just standing over me, just looking
[00:34:36] Anto: [00:34:36] at me I'm with friends, friends, Humbert. It was just like shaking my legs. I was like, Oh no.
[00:34:42] Dan: [00:34:42] So we still to the side
[00:34:43] Anto: [00:34:43] of the mat, like, absolutely just out of a gun is what just happened.
[00:34:46] Like, um, you kind of know what's happening when you get choked out your kind of grind after. It's not like when you get knocked out where you just don't know what's going on for a week. And when you talk to your grind and I just realized damn at the side of the mat, I was like, I'm [00:35:00] not. Competitive and North compete in jujitsu anymore.
[00:35:05] And it was a sad little kind of closure of my life, but it was happy in a way I was like, I'm free from the pressure of, of, of, you know, of, of beating people. Do you know what I mean of trying to beat people I'm free from that pressure? Um, So I decided that it was like, okay, that's probably it for me, I'll always do jujitsu in a friendly phone way, because it's so much fun.
[00:35:28] It's such a fun sport. But as far as like me trying to actually like physically beat another person, that was it for me, I'm kind of doing, um, so when a friend of mine, Chris Laddie was opening open Bray, I was like, do you know what the guys that I have to be to be, to do the best for the guys that I'm coaching?
[00:35:50] It'd be better if we all just rolled in with Chris, who was an amazing, who's an amazing dude. So I closed my little school and. [00:36:00] I was like, okay, what am I going to like, I wasn't sure if physically, like I always trained, I always did weights. I always did strength conditioning in that little school. I was coaching people in trail, running and weights, everything, you know, that kind of thing, everything physical.
[00:36:15] And that's what was really bringing me joy reread, really bringing me joy out of walking so much. The winning of things. It wasn't so much the, the huge overall get that person's personal competition, get them winning. It was the every day tiny little wins. And I realized then that happiness can be brought to people through the medium of the Versity, through the medium of physical training.
[00:36:49] And it's not about where you start. It's not about him mostly or his strong air. Can you flip over a bar? Can you do snatches? Can you do, you know, body weight, [00:37:00] whatever you have little wins and those tiny little wins where they're what, maybe it's a Keno on a deadlift. Maybe it's a mobility win. Maybe it's, you know, something really seemingly innocuous when.
[00:37:15] Is how you gain happiness within the gym environments. And I realized that was my calling. That's what I want to dedicate the rest of my life to. And so that's what I did. That's, that's what I'm doing. Um, it, you know, happiness. True, true. The medium adversity. Can I ask,
[00:37:32] Chris: [00:37:32] do you see that as progression or regression?
[00:37:36] Let me preface that because I would see it as a progression. Um, I would see it as transcendence. So you're, you're looking at process over outcome here. You, you've kind of decided that the outcome doesn't really matter to me. And you mentioned small wins every day. Um, you don't have to kind of 1% every day attitude that some people have the growth, but do you see losing your [00:38:00] competitive edge as our regression?
[00:38:01] Because I know a lot of people would say, if you're not winning, you're losing, you know, and that's a bad thing. Um, you know, by, by social paradigms, Um, and some people would say, you know, people who are a little bit more spiritual, et cetera. And when we're interested in stuff would say that that is transcendence, you know, you've moved beyond the necessity to, uh, get the metal, our podium, as you say, um, or to win the jujitsu boat.
[00:38:25] And I've always seen, I am attracted to do jujitsu. I've never done it before, but I think when all of the, um, lockdowns are lifted and we can, we can train, I might start because I'm interested in this idea of. Synchrony and harmony, and I would see jujitsu is more of a harmonious kind of, it's not a dance.
[00:38:43] Um, but it's two people rolling on the mat and competitive yells, like yeah, they call it the gentle art. No, which that attracts me even more because I'm not a combative person. I'm quite a gentle person, but you know, back to my question, do you see that as [00:39:00] regression or progression
[00:39:01] Anto: [00:39:01] hands in your goal? Um, so.
[00:39:07] You have a timeframe in life when you're young, you have, how can I put this year? You have like a timeframe to be great to win loads of things. And that's always going to end, you know, you see it with fighters in the UFC. Do you know what I mean? People that are like our winning streaks and then they lose and then the key blues and, um, and it, it, it feels sad to people, but you know, it's the same with everything.
[00:39:31] That's why, like in crossroad terms, Um, it's great that my Frasier recently, he was like the best student CrossFit ever retired as the most winningest chump. It's amazing. But like, um, how can I put this? Well, basically, like I see it as progression because at the end of the day, happiness should be your goals.
[00:39:50] Like your goals should be content and happy and bringing contentment and happiness to other people [00:40:00] through the work that you do. Isn't that the best thing overall. And also it's the most sustainable you can be about your mental health. Do you know what I mean? Like, you know, winning those alarms, um, you know, you might win, you might get a metal, like of years ago, I just throw all my medals.
[00:40:20] Like I I'd lose the various things were very sports. And I was like, what did these actually mean? Like, cause I got big into the idea of like, you know, um, Yeah. The idea of like helping people, regardless of, and, um, you know, getting them more mobile, you know, in a social environment like we do in the gym here.
[00:40:39] And I was like, what did these metals mean? I was like, they don't really mean, what do you, why do you keep them at all? I did that cool. Like there's no reason touchy like half the things. So I threw them out and that felt really freeing. I was like, Oh man, I'm free. Of, you know, uh, of trying to win more of these things or like, you know, or, or what they represent.
[00:40:59] So [00:41:00] I just thought this is my way, this is, you know, by listening through a distance, which is it's reactive, low of like loving apps. We, everyone that comes through our door, listening to them and coaching them with experience so that, you know, the best you can give them the best road. To, you know, their happiness, their physical happiness, and that's way more rewarding than any metal or, or anything like that.
[00:41:25] Um, then, then any kind of like, Hmm.
[00:41:30] Chris: [00:41:30] Yeah. It's not easy, man. It's not easy. As far as I'm concerned, you're a fucking rock stars, you know, and this kind of disrespect, this is why I was most interested in, in talking to you. Um, you know, you have physical feats that you've found that are interesting. And, um, you know, we haven't talked about your, your music career yet, but.
[00:41:48] Like the idea to me that someone can embrace what is unique to them, um, and throw away or abandoned. These conventional social contracts are paradigms and say [00:42:00] that, um, you know, this is the way I want to live. I don't really need these metals. Are these participation trophies? I don't need your, um, you know, your admiration.
[00:42:12] Um, you know, that, that, that's all that stuff I think is, um, just, uh, you know, praise for the Eagle and you seem to live your life just from the outside in, you know, you can speak to this, um, from the outside in, it appears to me that you've embraced who you are. You have decided that I don't need all these conventions.
[00:42:33] I don't need the metals. Um, you know, I don't need, uh, the fame. I just want to live in a certain way. And that is my, you know, we can call it your Dharma or this. You can see this across lots of different cultures. Um, you know, it, the artist way, the warrior way, it's the search for the authentic self. It's the search for congruence.
[00:42:54] Um, there, there are many ways to look at this across telling me Memorial, but it's all about [00:43:00] finding who you are being comfortable with, who you are. Uh, letting go of the necessity to please others and living in a way that is true to who you are. Okay. But, you know, I really want to speak a little bit about your music career and specifically about punk rock.
[00:43:21] Cause this is not something that I am obey with. I'm not, you know, hugely interested in the punk rock scene, but just leading up to this to try and better understand you. I did a bit of a deep dive into it. And, um, you know, I listen to a lot of your music and I got to say, man, I'm not just blowing smoke up your ass here.
[00:43:38] I already liked your music and I'm not, I'm not a kind of a punk fan of it. I'm a music fan. So I want to hear something good. You know, I listened and I, in particular, I thought, uh, you know, your lyrics were great. And can you, can you talk to us about punk rock and, and the influence of punk rock in your life?
[00:43:53] And you know why that genre, the genre you guys chose to get into?
[00:43:57] Anto: [00:43:57] Yeah, man. It just, it's just something that, that, that [00:44:00] made sense to me in the same way, the realization was kind of like fitness. You do. I mean, it's for fitness sake, not for winning book for, to make your, you know, to get better, stronger, faster, regardless of starting points the music in a way I've been doing not the whole time.
[00:44:19] And my band chewing on info has been a bond. We always say like, we're a bonds. That's really hard to like, because we only do things that we want to do. Do you know what I mean? We've like, we've always kind of like said no to most things. We, we just do things that we want to do. It's like, um, like the DIY movement to do it yourself movements.
[00:44:42] And obviously everyone's doing this now because on the internet, like, you know, you can do everything yourself. The need for record companies is diminishing for sure. Um, but. The DIY movements always peel to us. Like I've been in bands that were like, you know, sewing and stuff like that. And it was just like [00:45:00] really hard.
[00:45:01] Everyone else got your money. Everyone else got, you know, your percentages. You have to do exactly what everyone else wanted. Whereas with chewing on Sanford, we always just did what we wanted. Like we wanted, we went touring where we wanted a tour, um, you know, Because the DIY was a community based movement, you know, essentially, um, all over the world that was people that were willing to like put on shows for you.
[00:45:26] And whenever we went to America, like we'd even just go without even like, so much as a lead would have some bonds would like, uh, bonds and kinda like DIY labels that were assigned to over there would, um, would provide us with like absolutely everything. So we could get through customs and stuff like that, but it was just community all over all over Europe was the same.
[00:45:44] And it just meant that. It was people doing music for themselves for no one else. And it was purely like it was pure and that's why I'd always loved it. I really loved everything we did, which we went on for. Like, um, we [00:46:00] kind of got thrown into the punk rock thing just because of our like, mentality towards how music was done.
[00:46:07] But I just think we make music. I just think it's like, kind of like just general music and that kind of got logged in. Um, and it's fun. It's great crack. And I got to travel. The world would, uh, I consider it one of my actual brothers and then who I consider my brothers, the rest of them, you know, um, always fallen on never, uh, never hired, never feeling cheated was a big thing in music.
[00:46:30] Dan: [00:46:30] I think that's a big thing as well. Like Dublin, Dublin has, I, I feel such a unique DIY scene in a way that like, You know, there's so many amazing bands out there that all have just gravitated into this scene that are all playing the same shows. And that are speaking about stuff that like young people in Dublin wants to hear.
[00:46:50] You know what I mean? Like I always compare it. Like when I was, when I was, when I said to the lads, like, look, we should get onto on the show. And I was talking about chewy and I was like, look to me, it's like a modern, you guys are like a modern day, [00:47:00] Dublin. It's almost, you know, you're talking about stuff that people relate to and people, you know, understand like, Uh, like one good shirt, that song, uh, is like, everyone has experienced that song.
[00:47:12] You know what I mean? It's like everyone from Dublin knows how that feels and they don't understand the lyrics and you know what I mean? It's like, that's what I think it was so great about Dublin DIY as well, because it's just, it's such a scene that speaks to people. You know what I mean? And we've all seen it.
[00:47:26] Like I know Chris and all you guys aren't fill the emails like me. And I mean, I don't like the, the. Like everyone, everyone, uh, everyone is not saying like, you know, you've meet people that cause people that you wouldn't normally talk to what you'd see at shows and that you would have seen that show since you were 13.
[00:47:43] And now we're, everyone's, you know, 30 plus. And they still see each other at shows and it's like, everyone's grown up together and had this little livelihood together. You know what I mean? You might, they might talk to somebody, but once you see them at a show, they haven't seen him forever. You'll sit down and have a drink or have a chat with them.
[00:47:57] And it's, it's such a lovely time. You know what I [00:48:00] mean? I just really am. I really liked that. And I loved that about it. Ireland and like the Dublin scene, you know, this in particular. Absolutely.
[00:48:08] Anto: [00:48:08] It's, it's, it's great. It's community, it's community. Um, but the thing is like, does that all over the world, but it's really hard to find unless you're kind of, um, like Toronto LA or, or, um, kind of kind of going at it, but like I'm being on the dark side of music.
[00:48:24] And let me tell you the deal. Why is it even like, how can I put this? Like, Financially it's better DOI scene financially is better because, and I'm not saying it's gonna load it off. Um, it's just that if someone buys an album, they buy it off, you, they buy it off the artists. There's no middleman, just picking up a huge percentage for basically doing North and et cetera emails.
[00:48:50] Do you know what I mean? So, and that's, what's nice about it. You know, like, you know, like it's honest, Honesty, like, here's this thing you did. Here's some money for [00:49:00] it. I appreciate your product. We appreciate your business.
[00:49:03] Dan: [00:49:03] You know what I mean? Like it's, it's, it's,
[00:49:04] Anto: [00:49:04] it's kind of it's old school that way. And thanks for the Dubliners reference.
[00:49:08] Cause Luke Kelly is more absolute spirit, animal love, like all, all governors, vinyl, all Luke Kelly vinyl on an opposite. I played
[00:49:17] Dan: [00:49:17] banjo as well
[00:49:18] Anto: [00:49:18] as I like. I'm an absolute Lou Kelly perf.
[00:49:23] Chris: [00:49:23] Sorry. I was saying DIY punk to me seems like a form of philosophy. Like it's almost like you, the music is, um, the way of communicating this type of lifestyle and all that you spoke earlier, um, about throwing away your metals, which I, as a story, I think is quite profound to people can, can resonate with it's metaphorical, almost.
[00:49:47] There's one song in particular. I really liked. And I actually, I listened to it two or three times in a row because it resonated with me so much. And there's, there's something hard about, uh, you know, the poetry and stuff. And when you, when you read some poets, you [00:50:00] it's subjective. You know, what resonates with you is probably not how it's intended, but you know, you alluded to that idea of, of throwing away your Meadows.
[00:50:08] And one of the lines in the song, let me love you is, uh, you know, I don't need the screen, the crowd, the screen for me, I just want to lie in where my embedded my girls. She's all, all the crowd I need. You know, I just want to pass out tunes with my bro and I have some fun with my friends. And you have some dog, you have some lines in it about, uh, your dog, et cetera, to what
[00:50:29] Anto: [00:50:29] it's like.
[00:50:32] Chris: [00:50:32] I listened to it a few times because it reminded me like the line, the line, it, let me let you down. Um, what I felt when I listened to it was. There are many times in my life where I've been presented with opportunities to, to do something that would be considered by my peers or by society to be successful.
[00:50:52] You know, I'm an investor by trade. So, you know, people have offered to put money in my fund, et cetera, that [00:51:00] would accelerate our growth or, um, you know, People have offered me opportunities to invest in companies, you know, potentially that could, could, uh, pay off in the long run and this kind of thing. But the times that I am proudest of myself or the times that I can kind of stay true to my core values and say, nah, that's not for me.
[00:51:22] You know? Um, I don't need those metals. Um, you know, like I want to kind of tell the people that give me the opportunity to let you down here. You know, this is what you want. It's not what I want. Am I getting that right? Is that what you're alluding to there? Or is that just my personal take on the song?
[00:51:41] Dan: [00:51:41] Well, you're actually exactly right. So you're exactly right,
[00:51:45] Anto: [00:51:45] because that, that song is about a bond I was in, that were signed to a label in LA who, um, I was with for a while. And
[00:51:58] I'm going to put this, basically, [00:52:00] we were all set to go to LA. To record an album, um, which I wasn't mad about the idea. Um, at the time it was after I had gotten burnt out, she and I developed this fear of flying, which like I've, since, since gotten kind of like, you know, steps towards like doing I've gone on flights since, um, anyway, I developed this fear of flying after, after I got burned because it was just, I know it will manifest itself.
[00:52:27] Like I'd never really had fear before and the year before. Which Shui and various sort of bands I'd taken 32 return flights. So like, it was huge, huge amounts of flights. Like to the point where I just go to sleep before we even take it off, then I just felt a little fearful as well. I had one really bad flight on the way back from Leeds, we're playing a thing called Gold's Fest.
[00:52:48] And we got back on the plane, just dropped out of the sky. And I was already in a kind of like an unusual Headspace, but, uh, actually, you know what, we're playing this festival. [00:53:00] In Leeds, it was going to show you it was go crack, but it was like unofficially festival. And then we had a rental car. We didn't have anywhere to stay.
[00:53:10] And the record company didn't really pay for anything, you know, hence the DIY dly is better. Cause we could, you know, we could earn the money ourselves. Whereas like you play something with a record company, you don't get the money for it sometimes ever, or you get it like months later. Um, so we have to pay for.
[00:53:30] Well, we couldn't pay for a hotel. So we had to sleep in the car at the side, Leeds Bradford airport. Um, in the middle of the night we woke up, I would sit in the driver's seat and we woke up and there was a load of Lodz kicking our windows in like literally boots coming through the true windscreen. I'm going to just turn the car on and off.
[00:53:53] And we just went to the, uh, we went to the police station and they were like,
[00:53:57] Dan: [00:53:57] They basically just didn't care. Like a lot of parties, just like [00:54:00] just, they just didn't give a shit basically like tattoo parties, like giving out about someone, kicking the windows and grinds. Anyway, we
[00:54:06] Anto: [00:54:06] went, w we went to, to the airport, uh, we had this like traumatic flight Promatic flight where like, we just fell out of the air announcer a traumatic night before, after getting burned.
[00:54:18] Like maybe nine months, I was just in this mad Headspace. And I was like, So, I don't think I'll fly again for a while. And yeah, it was, it was just rough. And I was getting pissed off with the record company at that stage as well. Cause like we kept having to do everything ourselves. They were doing North and first at one stage, we went on a tour and they left us at a DHL station, long colony and wouldn't pay the van.
[00:54:49] To bring us to the airport. So we had like, basically a two day walk to get to the airport with North. And we had to like take stuff from shops and all, anybody else, it was Oxy fucking ranch in being with a company. [00:55:00] And they wanted us to come to America and all the lads wanted to do it. And I wrote this album, like with lots of help.
[00:55:10] And I just thought I'd rather not go to America where we're going to be like completely support supported. I don't want to do the flight anyway, everything kind of smack those. We're going to get fucked over. So basically I'll refuse to go. And which was a very traumatic thing for all the lads in the bond.
[00:55:31] I was very traumatic for me as well, because I was letting people down, Halen people down. It's one of the, like, I hate hurting people. I know no one likes it, but like, Oh man, like I. I get such guilt about hurting people, whether it's like breaking open someone or yeah. All, all that kind of like spectrum of guilt.
[00:55:48] Uh, just like, uh, to the point where sometimes I'll, I'll be to please eat those, not hurt someone bull, um, that's around. I had to be true to myself. I was like, we're going to get fucked over the act [00:56:00] that I love that his music is going to suffer really badly if I do this. Um, and I just didn't want to. Any of that life.
[00:56:10] And even though I love the lights, um, I just, I just decided, you know what, I'm not doing this. And obviously they didn't accept that. They went to America anyway and kept email ringing, trying to get me to go over and I just have to stay true. I was just, you know what, this isn't for me, nothing about this as good.
[00:56:29] Um, so I decided not to do it. And then that's what that song. Uh, let me let you down as a boat. It's directly what it's about. Um, yeah. There's no ad thing about you on the same floor as this. There's not too much like similar and it's like that, usually we're just talking like pretty direct language and that's what that was about.
[00:56:47] It was about me
[00:56:48] Chris: [00:56:48] taking it. I wasn't taking it literally, but I prefer, um, in addition to what I thought. Yeah, exactly. So, yeah, I, I don't wanna, I don't want to, um, again, I don't want to force this [00:57:00] point, but. How many people in their lives, um, have this existential moment at where they have to decide, you know, before we came on, I was explaining to the lots of this Robert Frost poem, you know, where they talk with the fork in the road is, is, is largely misinterpreted.
[00:57:19] But you know, people want to go the road less traveled or the road most traveled, but we can take that interpretation. Now, how many people in their lives do something? For the benefit of other people, because they don't want to let them down like that feeling that you were describing there of, you know, hurting people.
[00:57:38] Um, I know that feeling, uh, but you don't know if you're hurting people or not. You have this perception that if you do something. Whereby you, you know, in effect live your truth and decide, no, I'm not going to do this thing, or I'm not going to, you know, we can do something small here. I'm not gonna go to that party.
[00:57:57] Or I'm not going to go to that dinner. Or, you know, [00:58:00] think about people who are in relationships and stay in relationships really long-term and they are not in love with that person. Um, but they feel like they don't want to hurt them and they don't want to let them down. So they live a life, you know, they live, this is, you know, They, they live with a sense of existential dread and they never come to the point where they never have the bravery to do what you did, which is to say this isn't for me, you know, like that idea of it's almost proverbial to going to the, the Mecca of LA and, you know, living everyone else's dream, you know, you, you could be a fucking hit on ag, you know, I'm flying to.
[00:58:36] LA check me out. You know, I'm a rock star. Um, yeah, you're a rock star for know that the rock star moment is when you go. No, I'm just not, that's not for me. That's not who I am. You know, I prefer, like, I didn't know that, like I want to walk the Hills with my dog. Not the streets of LA was a literal line.
[00:58:51] You know, I'm thinking about Xena here. There's a, uh, you know, a line, you got it from the pound and you, you helped her, like we're going through your [00:59:00] timeline. Um, I loved watching the videos of you and Xena in, in, in the farms, et cetera. I've just got a puppy, the miner who's sitting at my feet here. And I was trying to think of like a situation where I would say no to something like that.
[00:59:15] I'm trying to think like, you know, imagine if someone told me that, like, you know, this podcast, could we, you know, Spotify want to sign us or something we could go with LA, I don't really want to do that. I'm not doing this podcast for. You know, with the downloads, uh, like doing this podcast so that we can help people, you know, we we've talked about, um, you know, if we're ever going to monetize, I'm really on the fence about, um, all of that, you know, uh, you know, when do we do it?
[00:59:37] Why don't we do it? I'm not really sure. I really want to do is help people. And you are a perfect example for people to look out like a shining light. I know, again, I don't want to blow smoke up. Anyone's asked here, but people have to look at your story and go, he stay true to who he is. He decided that he wanted to live a certain type of lifestyle, which is [01:00:00] actually more punk than going to LA.
[01:00:01] If you think about it, you know, you think about the DIY scene and the NAC and et cetera, it's more punk to say, fuck that then to, um, actually go there and get the deals and make the money on whatever and live a hollow life. Or you have decided I'm going to live with his sense of purpose. My ambition is not to be ambitious or to be at play the rock star.
[01:00:22] It's to be the rock star at the same old things. And the, you know, stick up my middle finger to conformity and to all of these, you know, existential rule books and social contracts by which most of us adhere to, you said, I'm not going to do that. You know, I'm going to go home and. I'm going to stay here.
[01:00:41] Like it seems to me that from that point you've developed this life where you now live in, in Galway. I believe in my
[01:00:48] Anto: [01:00:48] call-in
[01:00:51] Chris: [01:00:51] you opened your gym in, in 2019 and you live this, like, you know, holistic is a dirty word sometimes, especially in the fitness scene. [01:01:00] Um, you know, it brings to mind holistic supplements kind stuff, but I see holistic in its truest sense, which is you live life.
[01:01:07] Um, To the fullest, certainly from the outside in. And, you know, I love the idea of the parallels of punk, you know, from a little comes a lot to what you've opened up in a wild way, CrossFit and the way you approach, um, your coaching and your training and the ideas that you have. I heard you talk about, you know, that, that influencers, et cetera, in the fitness scene drive you crazy because.
[01:01:35] It's more about, uh, how they look and you know, that, that surface level bullshit. And we all know it's there. You know, anyone who, who trains knows that there's a lot of people juicing in this world. There's a lot of people making a lot of money off how they look and, you know, the abs, you know, it's very difficult to maintain.
[01:01:51] I set of apps, uh, 12 months a year, let alone 10 years. Um, you know, you're going to have to be taking something and to do that, [01:02:00] or just be on a continuity.
[01:02:03] Dan: [01:02:03] Sure, but can we talk
[01:02:04] Chris: [01:02:04] about like, why wait and your life in, in Galway and, and what's going on there and, and how you approach that whole thing, you know, you spend so much time in the mountains.
[01:02:13] Um, it seems like a lot of it's alone with your dogs. Um, but you know, I see you've got, Beau's born and last year, you know, life is different for you now, you know, it's not that blinding lights of LA and making those decisions. It's only.
[01:02:28] Anto: [01:02:28] Yeah, man. It, it, it definitely as well, like, so I started like CrossFit was something that in a nutshell I always kind of did anyway, before I found actual CrossFit CrossFit was something that I basically did, you know, and in the conditioning that we did, I was always interested in, in that side of things, that side of progressive training.
[01:02:52] Dan: [01:02:52] Inclusive,
[01:02:52] Anto: [01:02:52] progressive trainings, you know, that anyone can do. Um, and I had a coach called Holly Hodgins and [01:03:00] in, in Waco cross Waco, and we're running partners as well. We're doing like crazy rooms. And so it was all like, it was all just mountains, praying. And eventually we got together and her life's plan was to open a gym, um, in.
[01:03:20] Basically like just kind of, we want them to go at West for sure. She found a place and she asked me, she was like, Hey, listen, do you want to, do you want to do this with me? And then of course I jumped at that. I obviously get jumped. The data was all while the CrossFit is Holly's. You know, it's her thing.
[01:03:39] I am absolutely deeply committed and involved, but as she is the, the, uh, the matriarch of, of why a CrossFit and all, all that kind of, um, all inclusive, all that really like tacky stuff, you know, all the best points of coaching. Um, I learned from her for sure. She, she's obviously amazing. Um, [01:04:00] and we came up and you said holistic was a dirty word?
[01:04:02] Um, yes, sometimes it is. Well, that's what we do here. Do you know what I mean? We are not a there's CrossFit gyms that you come in, you lift as heavy as you can, or you just do wards and we're not, we're not that crazy good elite athletes that are winning things. Um, and there are amazing, and we have people who have never even touched a barbell who considered it themselves so unfit that they might need from start across it.
[01:04:30] And they're all in the same class. We're not at the moment because the stupid COVID book, they're all in the same class, they're all doing the exact same thing. Obviously, you know, CrossFit, it has a system called scaling where. By, you know, at a basic level, what scaling is say you were doing a deadlift scaling is someone could have a 200 kilo barbell.
[01:04:50] Someone could have an empty barbell. You know what I mean? And someone could have stick. And that's what scaling is. And that's what enables people who are beginners at any level to train [01:05:00] with elites. And there's no kind of, you know, all the lines are blurred. There's no like this corner, you kind of call them here.
[01:05:07] You kind of sit, what else does just. Everyone in it together, community. We get through this adversity together. We have fun. It's all smallest. That's basically our principle. Our little tagline is from complete beginner to elite athlete. And we really mean that we're really fucking me in that. That's not just something we say, like, if you're an elite athlete, you were getting no more attention than a dinner and vice versa.
[01:05:36] Um, because. There's a system that can work for everyone. Um, you know, we believe we have it and you have to enjoy your training. You have to be included, you know, you have to be in a friendly environment. If it's, if training somewhere, you don't want to be, you're not going to do it, you know? So that dental kind of main principles of Walnut CrossFit, and they really, really work.
[01:05:54] We see such amazing leaps and like some of the most [01:06:00] amazing leaps are. Yeah, they're the kind of like, First muscle-ups bodyweight, snatch, all that kind of stuff. Big dad is whatever. One of the best progressions that I hear from our people is people going off SSRI, antidepressants, and people feeling happy, people, you know, getting the confidence or can change their lives, whether it's like moving job.
[01:06:31] Maybe, you know, change not much changing privates, but you know, getting out of toxic relationships, stuff like that. They're the huge goals they're already there. They're there any Everest that CrossFit can, can let you climb for sure. Uh, definitely in, in our style across, well, maybe, maybe you're across, what's around the world and, but that's, we, we love hearing that kind of thing.
[01:06:53] The progression
[01:06:54] Chris: [01:06:54] I'm really glad you brought that up until I really, really like that idea of. No one. And I talk about this all the [01:07:00] time. Um, and we just talk about this morning. It's very important to me that, um, I get across, uh, that for me, like I, to give you my story, I've lived with depression since I was a child, it's kind of cyclical.
[01:07:16] It comes and goes. Um, and I have learned to look at a health in a holistic way. There's no delineation between. Mind and body for me. Um, you know, your mind is with you all of the time. Therefore it affects everything you do be that physical or mental. And I like to think about mental have, um, in a kind of a preventative way.
[01:07:38] Okay. Like I want this podcast to speak to people who are both ill and well, but I want the people that are well to realize that you must approach your mental health in the same way an athlete would approach their prehabilitation. And, you know, if you're, uh, at a, at elite level athlete, you will persistently be going for deep tissue massage, [01:08:00] et cetera.
[01:08:00] That is not because you have an injury. It is so that you are, um, minimizing the risk of injury. And, you know, the, you know, CrossFit is just a data. If you have training or multiple it's, uh, you know, multimodal. You're you're fit across multiple genres of finished book. Anything like, you know, you said earlier, you don't care what people do.
[01:08:20] You know, it just get out. I can do something or getting somewhere and do something, do anything. And I see. Um, you know, exercise as one of these preventative measures. I keep talking about this too. Okay. I have, there's multiple things in Derek's meditation, journaling. It's like a therapy exercise, diet, you know, all sorts of stuff.
[01:08:38] I'm adding in things about gut microbiome and Epogen in, in the type of food I eat, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Okay. There's lots of stuff. And, you know, people have their own thing, that idea of coming into a community, uh, and persistently exercising. I believe underpins and drives what you're talking about, which is these [01:09:00] shifts in people's lives, you know, coming off the accessorize, et cetera, are, uh, you know, to, uh, gave him the confidence to exit that relation to ship that they're perhaps being abused in and to go forward in their life, um, with contentment.
[01:09:18] Cause I, I, I disagree with you a little bit on the happiness thing, because I think happiness is like a transient. Emotion. I think people can have a kind of an underbelly of contentment in their life, but you can't always be happy. It becomes a gold, it's an emotion. It's like anger,
[01:09:30] Anto: [01:09:30] you're dead, you're dead right there.
[01:09:32] Chris: [01:09:32] Can't always be angry, you know, but I, I, I'm a big believer in the idea that mood follows action, and you must take action with your mental health. You know, you must do something in your daily life that is going to make you, um, introspect feel better. You talk about. Adversity in your training, manufactured adversity.
[01:09:53] That's exactly what it is. What we've talked, two people so far to that do ultra running and you do the same thing. Why do people run [01:10:00] more than 5k or a marathon? What is the point? Because like, there's this untapped human potential in everyone that people don't realize is there. And all of a sudden you can go from a 5k to a 10 K to a marathon, to an ultra, um, to, you know, in Connor Keith's case who episodes go to a 200 miler.
[01:10:19] Um, why does that progression happen? It happens because people are like, Jesus, there's a lot more in my tank than I thought there was. And I'm learning a hell of a lot about myself. And this is affecting the trickle down effects of me being in this community is running community and it is CrossFit community or, um, you know, going to psychotherapy and this kind of stuff, is it all trickles down and you, your baseline goes from, you know, perpetual anxiety or dread or depression or whatever people are going through at the moment.
[01:10:48] Most people. I would say at this moment in time, you know, we are, I don't know how many months deep into, um, coronavirus and lockdowns, et cetera. Most people's baseline is anxiety. People are bordering on [01:11:00] depression that don't realize it yet. And I feel like much more people need to be, um, looking at this preventatively.
[01:11:07] Then then reactively. I think no one wants to make, they can make a point here. So yeah, no,
[01:11:12] Noel: [01:11:12] that's, it is it, that's an excellent point, Chris, and it's really important to do that. Like, um, instead of waiting around and reacting, you know, w there's always stuff that we can do, and this is something that comes up in my work, you know, there's little tips and tricks that we can do.
[01:11:27] And. You know, in reaction to something when we are actually in the midst of depression or anxiety or anything like that. And, and that is absolutely stuff you can do with, with therapy and training. And, and that what I always come back to kind of the, the forest rule of fire fighting, or the forest rule of crisis management tools to avoid the, for the fire on the cry and or the crisis in the first place.
[01:11:46] And that's exactly what you know, speaks to there and something that I I'd kind of add to that as well. And this is something that. I, you know, in research it was coming through and, and as you've talked in there today is coming through, [01:12:00] it's not just about doing things, you know, and that's like you said, there with regards to, you can just lift weights, you can do this, you can do that.
[01:12:06] And this is again, it's something crystal, you know, crystal testified to this. It's something that I talk to talk about Atlanta. It's. Yeah. So you've got connections there. You've got connections, more so with people, but also with things, you know, that with the things that you do as in the running, um, as in the, uh, as in the weights that you're doing, but it's the quality of those connections and something like building a community.
[01:12:31] We're social creatures. So we'll always, for the most part, we'll always wants to, you know, come back to the group, come back to our tribe, come back to our community. I think that was a big thing for, for many years. Like the gym was very in the individual. Like I've always come under your, the same, like I would have played hurling and different teams sports.
[01:12:48] So it was great to have team sports, but people in the gym they're just, it was, there was, there was no kind of team field with gym and the last number of years and stuff. Like CrossFit and particularly what I've seen [01:13:00] you build, build, and the way you're building it though, that's the key thing. It's the quality of the, of what you're building it's it brings those relationships.
[01:13:08] Um, what I find by having those relationships, those quality relationships. Then it comes back to what you said until people are more likely to, you know, not need the, the, the, the extra support of an SSRI or they're, uh, they're able to realize a lot more things because those quality connections help improve them.
[01:13:28] It gives them the right atmosphere to grow. It gives them that rice kind of setting that the best setting possible to grow. It's a really interesting kind of point that has. I, I really that's what I've seen from, from you. And, um, you personally, the quality of your connections, it's like, you've like you broke down the ego, you broke down the different things, improved your quality connection, and then share that like that with, with the CrossFit gym, um, as well.
[01:13:55] It's just, I think it's, it was a, it's an important point to, to look at about those quality [01:14:00] connections and what you've done. A model. Other people can deal with them as well.
[01:14:06] Anto: [01:14:06] Yeah, we're, we're S we're social beings. You know what I mean? We are, you know, we need other people, no matter how much kind of like people think they're lone wolfs, like we need other people. And with other people you can achieve more. Whether it's just your, you know, you can achieve more true personal progress or as a group, like we need people, people, people, people like nothing, nothing amazing.
[01:14:29] Long-term. Can be, uh, can be achieved alone. What's that saying again, if you want to go fast, go along, go alone. If you want to go along, go with people, something along
[01:14:39] Dan: [01:14:39] those lines, but it's true. Like, you know, if
[01:14:41] Anto: [01:14:41] you want to create something like complete sustainable, you need, you need a team of people, you know what I mean?
[01:14:46] Your community bucket that's for sure.
[01:14:49] Chris: [01:14:49] Absolutely. Man, I think once again is what every guest. Um, you know, we try and keep this to 90 minutes. I feel like I could talk to you for days
[01:15:01] [01:15:00] to train, you know, but we'd like to do something to show off the show it's called call the quickfire round. Um, and we go for 10 questions. You got five seconds to answer each one. And so whatever comes to your head, okay. There's no onus here for you to give us anything. Smarter elaborate. You know, he's given us enough in the show and that people can really take from him.
[01:15:21] So this is just a bit of, you were
[01:15:22] Anto: [01:15:22] asking this of someone with dyslexia and add to give, like,
[01:15:27] Dan: [01:15:27] your head,
[01:15:29] Chris: [01:15:29] whatever comes to your head, let's get through it. Okay.
[01:15:32] Dan: [01:15:32] I'm going to say
[01:15:32] Anto: [01:15:32] something.
[01:15:36] All right. Question one. Right? The question was,
[01:15:40] Chris: [01:15:40] where is your dream venue to play a gig?
[01:15:47] Anto: [01:15:47] Um, I like working with workman's is great. It's three casualties and like, it's
[01:15:52] Dan: [01:15:52] just like, there's no pump a bed at, so
[01:15:54] Chris: [01:15:54] it's nice. Not Wembley, Stan, you know,
[01:15:58] Anto: [01:15:58] not, I don't give a shit.
[01:16:02] [01:16:00] Chris: [01:16:02] Okay. Question two. If you could only do one exercise for the rest of your life, what would it be?
[01:16:10] Anto: [01:16:10] An Olympic lifting cleaner.
[01:16:13] Chris: [01:16:13] Nice answer question three dogs or humans, which do you prefer?
[01:16:17] Anto: [01:16:17] Uh, humans close, man. That's not fair. That's not a fair question, but daddy or mommy,
[01:16:24] Chris: [01:16:24] name something weird or absurd that you love?
[01:16:31] Anto: [01:16:31] Uh, jigsaws. Grass question five. I absolutely could cook grass. Like I even like take the blades every time it's sharpened the blade every single time. Like I have this beautiful, like meditative moment with the blade, like make sure I can code paper and then I put it on my mower and go for it. Oh man.
[01:16:52] Sorry, go ahead.
[01:16:55] Chris: [01:16:55] Oh, name something. Hey, something you couldn't live without.
[01:17:04] [01:17:00] Anto: [01:17:04] Man. That's a hard one because like, it's like, obviously I'm going to say like my partner, my baby, what do you mean? Like, like a material thing? That's the answer. Okay. That's the answer? That's the answer?
[01:17:15] Chris: [01:17:15] Yeah. Question six. If you were the last person on earth, what would you still do?
[01:17:26] Anto: [01:17:26] Yeah. Like just travel the world. Wouldn't it. You just, you just, that's all you do, wouldn't it? Yeah.
[01:17:34] Chris: [01:17:34] That's all you do.
[01:17:37] Dan: [01:17:37] questions. Yeah.
[01:17:40] Chris: [01:17:40] If you could broadcast a message to everyone on earth, what would it be?
[01:17:50] Anto: [01:17:50] Don't take things so seriously. That's what I would say. Like there's so much, there's so much like, yeah. Like it's just like, there's so much kind of, um, [01:18:00] especially like with all, you know, politics these days and who like, you know, obviously all Facebook and Instagram algorithms, Twitter algorithms work on that outrage.
[01:18:10] Outrage being their main kind of like source of, uh, you know, they show you something that you're like, Oh, that's disgraceful. And you feel like you want to type and, you know, chastise someone or do something. And there's a lot of that. Like when, in reality, like, We can all just relax a little bit. You know what I mean?
[01:18:23] I feel like we just all relax a little bit. Like, don't take things too seriously. Obviously. There's things you have to put. Like, I feel like everyone could deal with a bit of dose with just like, take a breath. Think about things it's probably growing.
[01:18:38] Dan: [01:18:38] I'm not going to be known as that. That was just a tiny part of my life.
[01:18:47] Anto: [01:18:47] I'm
[01:18:47] Dan: [01:18:47] a father. Now I go do that.
[01:18:51] Anto: [01:18:51] What
[01:18:52] Chris: [01:18:52] advice should young people ignore?
[01:18:56] Anto: [01:18:56] Oh, M D definitely. Definitely. [01:19:00] And career-based advice from a young age, like the idea that in the junior cert you have a career, you know, meeting with people like. As if the idea of 15 year olds should be concentrating on stuff they want to do for the rest of their lives. Like it's so much bullshit. And like, actually really it's, it is a tragedy and it's just like this emphasis put on to, um, you know, are you having to know, um, like the pressures that people are under?
[01:19:32] Listen, I'm gonna like that friend. I told you, you died. Kill themselves. Do you know what I mean? And it was like, no one could say for sure what it was, but like those kinds of pressures can't help anyone. And they don't really serve much positive outcomes either. Like if you ask a 15 year old, what they want for dinner, that's going to change within two seconds.
[01:19:54] Like, like not like, what do they want to do for the rest of their formalized? Hey, listen. [01:20:00] Absolutely. God bless you. If you know, at that stage that you want to be. This and that, but like the idea of pigeonholing yourself that you own is bullshit. Even the leaving cert as a whole, like why don't they emphasize that at 23, you can just do whatever you want.
[01:20:18] Anyway, do you know what I mean? You have your leaving cert to get into your college course, but at 23 you can get into your college course anyway, because of the CAO, like in, in Ireland anyway, Um, so it's like all this pressure, but you could just wait a little while. And as a 36 year old mind, 23, you are still a child.
[01:20:38] You're still a child. You have so much time to do whatever you want. In fact, you a college course at that stage of your life, you're going to have a more mature attitudes towards it. Or maybe, I don't know. Well, you'll have a better idea of what life is and what you want out of a course, as opposed to going from one institution to the next, with no real life experience in between.
[01:20:57] So what I will say is don't take that seriously. [01:21:00] Maybe go live your life before kind of committing to something and don't feel the pressure of having to become an accountant looking 15. Like, yes, we need accountants. Great. That there's accountants alive for. You don't have to agree to be one. I can
[01:21:13] Dan: [01:21:13] imagine there was a giant floors of people all just clapping their hands right now after that.
[01:21:18] Why is it? Why is it words are never spoken
[01:21:21] Chris: [01:21:21] preach, brother preach. Okay. Two more questions. You're turning a quickfire round into a slow flow around it, but doesn't
[01:21:26] Dan: [01:21:26] matter if you feel,
[01:21:29] Chris: [01:21:29] if you feel overwhelmed, what do you think? Really do ruin good answer. 10. Finish this sentence at the end of the day, it all comes down to.
[01:21:42] Anto: [01:21:42] Happiness diamond. I don't know if that's right, but if you do feel, I was thinking if you were happy at the end of the day, that's great. But I'm thinking like the end of the day, not
[01:21:53] Dan: [01:21:53] I
[01:21:53] Anto: [01:21:53] like to go to bed. So I took that into context. That's my add. There you go. And at the end of the day, what matters most [01:22:00] it's probably connection.
[01:22:01] Isn't it? It's, it's, it's, it's more than likely connection. It's uh, you know, ha you know, having other people around you. Um, I'm being kind of satisfied with the relationships that you're in, whether they be like, uh, familiar or like partners, whatever it is, like connection is probably probably at the end of the day matters most.
[01:22:19] Chris: [01:22:19] I know it's been an absolute pleasure, really enjoyed it. Grateful for your time. The stories were great. Profound. You know, we, we talked about death, we talked about, um, you know, turning our back and convention. And we talked about a lot of interesting stuff, but I know that people. Are going to resonate with, this has been an episode five with Andrew Clavin.
[01:22:40] She's the one DMC podcast over now. One more thing before I go, I keep forgetting to ask this guy's going to kill me cause he used to do this in post where? Okay.
[01:22:52] Anto: [01:22:52] Um, I'm Tokelauan on Instagram coach Andel and. People don't have to [01:23:00] find me. It's you know what I mean? I'm happy.
[01:23:03] Dan: [01:23:03] You know,
[01:23:06] Chris: [01:23:06] why do we cross with.com?
[01:23:07] Why do we cross with them?
[01:23:09] Dan: [01:23:09] Find Weiwei,
[01:23:09] Anto: [01:23:09] CrossFit, calm, enjoy yourself, and entered the manufacturer. Diversity of training. Um, absolutely do that. Why we CrossFit? I
[01:23:22] Dan: [01:23:22] that's good. Me personally. That's great.
[01:23:28] Chris: [01:23:28] They might have some brownies.
[01:23:37] all right, we're done. We're done. We're done.
